Common Expressions of a Narcissist

Here are a few expressions commonly used by a narcissist. Please feel free to add any you might have in the comment section.

“I don’t know what to say about that”
When he knows he should be showing an emotion but because he doesn’t feel the same as everyone else.

“There are many types of love, the love I have for you is different”
When he is caught saying I love you to another woman.

“They can’t believe their good fortune to finally have someone there who knows what they are doing, it’s going to take me a while to straighten up the mess from the last guy”
(Every time he gets a new job)

“I had them eating out of my hands.”
(Believes in manipulating others to create results).

“You didn’t let me finish what I was saying.”
(After verbally maiming and then pretending there was more to say)

“Just because I didn’t do what you wanted when you wanted it.”
(A justification for receptively breaking promises)

“Just because I didn’t say what you wanted to hear.”
(A justification for verbal abuse)

“You’re the only person who misunderstands what I say”

“You’re to sensitive, over-emotional, paranoid.”
(Same as above)

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, you can’t repeat what I said 5 minutes ago”
(No matter what you say they said they will disagree)

“I’m sorry, what more do you want from me, I can never make you happy no matter what I do.”
(Followed by justifications for the behaviour with body language that is clearly not aligned with an apology)

“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry.”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)

“Why do you have to live in the past?”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)

“What about your issues?”
(When failing to take responsibility for unacceptable behaviour)

“You make me behave like this, I am only reacting to your actions”
(Same applies for above)

“You’re the only person in the world I have these problems with.”
(Same applies for above)

“I can’t live with your dysfunctional perceptions”

“Why would I want to; come home, answer the phone, do something nice for you, (fill in the blank) when you act like this?”(Diverting blame)

Uses “loop hole” statements, such as:
“I *think* I’m falling in love with you” (he didn’t say he does love you)
“I *could* do this or that” (later he can say I said I could not that I would)
“*If* I asked you to marry me would you?” ( he didn’t ask)
“What size is your ring finger?”
(How you interpret that is not his fault)

“You act like my mother,” or, “You’re a control freak.”
(When asked for the truth or trustworthy / accountable behaviour)

“You know I hate conflict, but you continue to create it”
(When you confront him on something he’s done)

“This is exactly why I look elsewhere, you are always angry”
(When confronted about cheating)

“You should listen to yourself”

“If you knew the truth you wouldn’t be upset” when asked what is the truth then? Replies,”You wouldn’t believe me if I told you anyway so why bother?”

“I’ve had enough, it’s over”
(When confronted on something like continued infidelity, rejecting you for being angry)

“I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person”
(While walking away from an argument)

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626 thoughts on “Common Expressions of a Narcissist

  1. Hi,

    How to apply NO contact when the is a life but also a business partner and father of your kids…
    Any advice on protecting the kids?

    Thanks

    Pam

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  2. A lot of this is bollocks. Most of those apparent common expressions of a narc, nearly all of them without the alternative meaning/interpretation given are not identifiable to narcissistic behaviour and are just common expressions when people are emotionally upset and arguing or other behaviour more benign then narcissism is at play. Even with the additional context implied they still don’t Imply narcissism. I think some more learning about narcissism and some responsible ethics be practiced if you are going to attempt to educate others about such a serious subject. This and a lot of what you write can be very misleading for the uneducated or those unfamiliar with this subject.

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    1. Josh, this post is solely made up of the lines victims heard from their abuser, whether he was a narc or not. I personally added a couple of my own quotes that I heard but basically I give people free reign in here because I asked for people to contribute their own quotes. I am not going to analyze everything everyone contributes, I was not there, I do not know the circumstances under which these things were said.
      One of the greatest tools a narcissist uses is double meanings to words or statement that can be taken more than one way. That way they can always say the victim misinterpreted what they said. Of course not all the statements here are typical narcissistic quotes, and I would hope that anyone coming here would not hear one of these lines and deem someone a narcissist based on that alone.
      In my experience people don’t come here unless they are looking for answers as to why the love of their life has turned against them, in other words they are here because they have been abused and they are looking for answers but again I would hope that they would go on to read the posts intended to educate someone about narcissists.
      If this is the only post you have read then you need to read more before you criticize me or my blog.
      I happen to take this blog very seriously and I take great pride in the fact that I don’t put anything on this blog unless I have experienced it personally or researched it extensively. I don’t “guess” and I don’t embellish facts.
      And that brings me to the question, “Why are you here?” If you haven’t been abused by a narcissist then you must have been told you are one because anyone who hasn’t been involved with a narc doesn’t go to blogs about them. Whereas someone who has been called a narcissist would go looking to prove he is not one, because they never admit to any faults.
      If you want to educate yourself before you start spouting off and back your statements with proof I will listen to what you have to say, because I CAN back everything I say on here with research proving it.
      Enough said. Next time you want to criticize, do it intelligently.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Certainly, the expressions themselves are not indicative of NPD and non disordered people use them. This section is in conjunction with the other sections. Have you read the other sections? Please read them before attacking someones ability to speak about their experiences and attained knowledge re the subject stated. Also read the disclaimer found in the right side bar.

    Agreed, NPD is very serious. Ask any of the wonderful women here that loved one, lived w/ one and experienced their toxicity. THEY can speak from their experience with more impact that any person that is simply writing a book and listing traits.

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  4. In reply to Josh. You obviously know nothing about being involved with a narc. and the heartbreak and destruction they can do.
    Methinks you are one.
    You bring no education to this web-site.
    Now go away you, senseless person and leave other empathic people alone.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Hi Ellie – good to hear from you.
        I’m Ok thanks – hope you are too?
        Goodness, is that ridulous person – Josh writing a book? Sure it will be a best seller. lol
        Still fighting in court for my house with the Devil.
        Nitemare – he has tried to take my soul and finances – Spent £4,000 so far in Solicitor’s fees and he still intends on destroying me. This is what they do as we all know.
        He will never take my fighting spirit – no-matter –
        Next court hearing March.
        fingers crossed xx
        Whatever the outcome, I am so glad to be free of the lies and deceipt, womanising, and the general horror these walking, despicable, vile so called, people can do. I didn’nt believe he was the same person when I saw him in court last time – he was a total stranger – couldn’nt believe I’d been married to it, for 10 years……? Re-wrote history like they always do.
        I only hope other people read Carrie’s Website – and take the advise she gives, because is it true.
        I have seen some true horrid stories and I have cried because I have felt their pain.
        I just hope they get our mutual message – and we can help them in anyway.
        They can fly like a bird – and can take their own lives back, but it’s difficult – one day at a time. I am trying to fly, my soul is healing but the nightmares still come back.
        Hugs Ellie xx

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Doing ok here, I just keep on keeping on. Don’t know if Mr Josh here is writing a book or not. Blogs like this go much farther and deeper than any book with it’s gobblity gook can go. The label doesn’t matter as much as the fact they are EVIL.

          YOU are an inspiration I admire your strength and I hope that those that read here can draw from it and hear your words.

          Your are always in my prayers

          Ellie

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          1. Thanks Ellie – Certainly don’nt feel like a inspriation – but hope I can give help to others who have crossed the same path as us.
            It was a road that let me to believing I was insane, crazy, a drug addict, with the help of his vile daughter. He certainly chose me well. Had my own property – Believed him and supported him throughout 5 yrs in prison in rape -Told me the vile stuff about his ex-wife was he beliveable !- Day after I married him totally changed. He is totally in love with his daughter – weird, but she is the wonderchild and probably still is – He put his ex-wife into a mental hospital. She was cutting her wrists at this point – no wonder? I have heard from her and she said he is cruel and demented. She has got a great new life and I know now what he had put her though.The daughter has not seen her mother in 18 years due to his lies The police on the door, accusing me of drug taking? had to come with his vile daughter – sending drug people to my door. Thank God the Police didn’nt believe him – he could have put me in jail – I do hope other people recogized the DEVIL – We can only in our way, give strenght and support to others – it’s bloomin freezin in England. Hope it’s warmer near you. Much Love Carrie. Good Karma – I pray for you also. Thankyou to all the wonderful woman on this site xxxx

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          2. Ellie – thanks for you comments – You are always in my prayers too.
            I sit down each evening and meditate – and try to release my bad feelings for hope and blessing.
            I have a great bath with candlelight and natural scents……which really helps…..I believe in Karma…..and the realization there are really bad people around……
            Nothing I can do about that about from, trying to heal……..and give kindness out when Evil was in my life. Hugs xxx

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