A few months ago I Googled “How to seduce a woman” to see what would come up. I was appalled at how many web sites are out there on how to get any woman into bed.
I used a generic email address and pretending to be a male joined one site to see what kind of material they would send.
Following is a typical title of one of the newsletters I get weekly.
“How to Manipulate The Target’s Friends To Your Advantage”
They always refer to the woman as the “target” which is insulting enough but then they go on to describe in detail how to manipulate a woman’s nature instincts in your favor; guaranteeing that if you follow their instructions you will get laid.
These aren’t simple dating instructions telling guys how to dress or how to treat a woman in order to get her interest it is strictly how to get laid the quickest way possible.
Years ago JC was printing something off of the internet and didn’t realize the printer had run out of paper it hadn’t finished printing. He went to work, I went to print something and low and behold what should print out but an instruction manual on how to get any woman into bed.
When I confronted him on it he said it was for business. Business? What kind of business? He said the techniques were the same as you would use in closing a business deal. Don’t worry; I didn’t shallow that one. (He wasn’t always good at thinking on his feet) but I let it go when he threw all the pages away.
A year later when I was trying to close a drawer in the bathroom and it wouldn’t close all the way I took the drawer out to see what was stopping it from closing and what should appear? Nope not 8 tiny reindeer! Ok, I’ll tell you. The entire book on “How to Get Any Woman into Bed” which was about 100 pages AND a dozen porn magazines.
He blamed the porn on the previous owner’s teen age son’s but he just shrugged off the seduction book. I threw it out and damned if it didn’t reappear a few months later in his brief case. I never did get to read the whole thing but from what I did read I could recognize some of the tactics he had used on me.
Most of what these courses teach guys is to keep the woman guessing. Treat her like shit but give her just enough to keep her hooked. Come on sweet and loving and then not call when you said you would or ignore her and pay attention to her friends more.
Don’t compliment her much in fact one said to criticize her in a subtle “joking” way.
Anyway, there have always been a$$holes in the world and books on seduction but now it is at the finger tips of every man and teenage boy out there. I think that is what bothers me the most, before the internet this kind of information wasn’t available to a young guy. I raised my son to treat women with respect and if I ever saw him do otherwise I brought him up on it.
Like the one time I caught him sneaking a young girl into his room. Teenagers think adults are deaf, dumb, and stupid. I was upstairs in the bathroom and heard the back door open and the whispers and giggles of Kris and a girl. I waited a short while and then went down to his room and knocked on his bedroom door.
Me, “Can I come in?”
Him, “I’m having a nap Mom”.
Me, ” A nap? Are you sick, I should come in and make sure you don’t have a fever”
Him, “I’m fine Mom”
Me, “Come open the door Kris”
Me, “Kris, open the damn door, NOW”
He opened the door and I can see he’s excited to have company.
Me, “You and your little friend can come upstairs and talk to me.”
Him looking rather sheepish, “ok mom”.
I went upstairs waiting in the family room and I saw him walking the girl to the gate and called them both in and made them sit down. I caught the “eye roll” at each other.
I asked to be introduced to the girl and recognized the name to be a girl he had talked about who had the hots for him and he wasn’t interested in, in the least.
I said, “do you guys know why I am upset?” And they shook their heads.
I said, “I have been a single mom for most of Kris’s life and he has seen me get hurt by men. I have always told you Kris, I expect you to be honest with a woman and to treat her with respect” He nodded.
I went on, ” I don’t think you are being honest with this young lady and that disappoints me. And you my dear” looking at the young girl. “You don’t ever have to have sex with a guy to get him, you have to have enough respect for yourself to not give it up just to get the guy; because in the long run they will use you and dump you. I am not saying you have to wait until you’re married or even that you have to love each other. But Kris, you have to be honest about your intentions. And to the girl I said, “I had a baby at 16 and gave it up for adoption; you don’t want to go through that believe me. But more than that, if you don’t respect your body and your value no one else will”.
Then I dismissed them. Kris walked her out and then came back and apologized to me for his behaviour. I told him he didn’t have to apologize but I wanted him to think about it.
It is the only time I stepped in and gave my son shit for how he treated a woman. I have always been proud of the respect he shows women his whole life.
But what happens with the boys that aren’t taught how to treat a woman and the only instruction they get is off the internet?
Just my thoughts.
Posted by Carrie the Lady Witha Truck using WordPress for BlackBerry.