My Heaven on Earth is so Close!!

I woke up yesterday morning in bed with two puppies snuggled up tight against me and had a feeling it was going to be cold getting out of bed. I went to sleep with my clothes on the night before, jacket and all because it was simply too cold to get undressed and put cold pj’s on but a person can only wear the same clothes for so long and then you have to brave the elements. I went and huddled by my portable heater and listened to the torrential rain and then hail and then rain again for the better part of the day. Finally the sun came out and warmed the trailer a bit and I got changed and took the dogs for a walk.  When I got outside I realized why it was so cold, the snow is so low in the mountains!! OMG!! I panicked, I have to get out of here before the snow flies!!! And it is too close for comfort now!!

I have a trailer that I am really excited about that is a very viable option.

I did a yard clean up 6 -7 years ago for a couple of brothers who bought a property together. There was a house, a double wide trailer and a 40’ holiday trailer that was left behind. They each took a home and offered me the trailer. Back then I had no use for it and they wanted several thousand dollars for it.  I had gotten to know them and their dad quite well through the cleanup and one of the brothers gave me information about digestive enzymes for Kato and was instrumental in saving Kato’s life. I kept in contact with them and eventually JC met them and one of them for sure was on his Facebook.

I hadn’t seen them since before JC and I split, so almost 3 years has gone by, but I drove past their property and they still have the trailer. I really didn’t want to go there, I don’t know if JC has taken his new woman there to show her off (that is just his style).

It had been embarrassing enough that on his FB he had over 2000 “friends” 90 % of which were porn stars and “movie” stars from all over the world and I was listed as his girlfriend. He had gone from “In a relationship” to “Single” to “In a relationship” all in the matter of 6 weeks and been posting pictures of her and him as his profile pic right from day one. And going on about how life’s setbacks are so much easier when you are with the right woman. And he had the best birthday; EVER!!! and how she cut down the trees, milled the lumber and built a home all by herself, and how he’s such a lucky man.

He wouldn’t even acknowledge I exited 1/2 the time. I took myself off his Facebook while we were still together because I got sick of every time I signed in I would be inodated with, ” JC just friended some woman and maybe I want to friend her too” messages, dozens of them every day. My kid and some of my friends were on his FB, his son, it was so disrespectful. Then his African sweetie plastered all over his wall that she wanted him and couldn’t wait to see him again and did it not once but three times in a row. But when I went in and did a few of those quizzes you do to see how your answers match up with someone and they post on the person’s wall; he gave me shit and said I was being catty. He said his uncle was a very religious man and on his site and he didn’t need to see my crap. pardon me???? Oh there I go again; see? I just have to say his name and I get pissed off.

Back to what I was saying.

It still hurts I have to admit, if you doubt that you didn’t read the previous paragraph. So I just wasn’t too anxious to go there and answer questions; you know what I mean?

Finally I got up my courage and went to see them last week, yes they had figured JC and I were split, I told them he had been abusive but didn’t go into details.

Yes they still wanted to get rid of the trailer but now it is a lot older and is in need of repair.

They said it isn’t livable at the moment. I didn’t say it but I was thinking, “You don’t know the kind of places I lived with JC.”

I asked to see the inside and it was much nicer than I remembered, in fact it was nothing like I remembered it, it wasn’t even the same layout!! I must have dreamed I went inside it. I thought it had been gutted but it has the kitchen…….I am going back today or tomorrow and will post pics.

The push outs have leaked and gone rotten around the inside edges but I am sure they can be fixed, they were once, but the push outs weren’t sealed properly and they leaked again. I know from living at the resort that all push outs leak eventually and you have to build a roof over them if you plan to live in them. The bathroom even has a tub! Oh to soak in a tub even a small one would be heaven, simply heaven!! It needs a fridge and hot water tank. I know where I can get all the laminate flooring to do the whole trailer for nothing or very cheap, some ply wood, insulation, and I am set.

It just so happens my son called the other night to tell me that he is driving out for a holiday, the second week of November, stopping to see his daughter and then coming to see me before he heads into Vancouver for a few days. I told him about the trailer and he said his buddy Zac (they have been friends since they were 5, Zac is like my own boy) and he will dedicate a full day to doing anything that needs doing on the trailer and maybe he will be able to talk Brodie, another long time buddy to come help. I am sure I can come to some sort of deal on the trailer probably $500 and hopefully paying in payments. So trailer is a done deal, the work crew is a done deal, the only issue now is I have no where to park it and THAT is a big issue.

I have put an ad on Craigs List and I went to the resort last night and looked on the bulletin board and there are quite a few lots for sale or rent so I will make some calls today. I didn’t think I would ever want to go back to Everglades after leaving there, looking in my rear view mirror as I pulled away and thinking, “If I never see that place again it will be too soon.” It took me about 6 years to even go back to visit friends but I have been driving past it every day for 4 months and it has lost it’s power over me.

I always loved the resort, I had made some good friends (who are still there) and was a welcome addition to the little group that lives there year round. It was JC that left the bad taste in my mouth (and every one else’s mouth too), not the resort. It has all the makings of my “Heaven on Earth” dream. A small little place, near water, where I can have a dog (or two) but my son wants to take Laila back with him (that solved that problem), where I can have a little plot of land for a garden, they have wifi, cablevision, it is ½ hour closer to civilization, my phone has reception there, and it is close enough and big enough I could have family and friends over for dinner.

PLEASE say a prayer that I can work out some sort of deal there!! I am scared because it really could be the answer and as you know my life hasn’t always gone real smoothly. Please God let this be it Please!!!!!

10 thoughts on “My Heaven on Earth is so Close!!

  1. twistedheart

    Oh Carrie,
    I am sending you nothing but positive thoughts! I am so happy for you. Isn’t it amazing when you can start to feel that things might just click into place? I am waiting for that feeling. You deserve it…not only for everything you have gone through, but for everything you do everyday for everyone that comes to your sight in search of somebody that has been there….that understands. You are a good woman- a strong woman, and I have all the hope and faith in the world that this is going to work out just the way you want and need it too!!!:)


  2. marion

    Hi Carrie, when i was with (ex) i felt so weak and pathetic, he was always putting me down, humiliating ,me (as they do). I now realise that I, ME, am the strong person, and that HE is weak and pathetic. I thank you for starting this site, you are a godsend, if it is gods will, it will happen, God Bless You, I will be praying for you 🙂


  3. The Heretic

    I really hope it all works out, and you have an awesome place for you and the pups. I have style questions about Canada that I will have to ask you sometime.


  4. ladywithatruck Post author

    Thank you so much Michael!! I really hope so too. It would be the first time I would feel like things really will work out instead of faking it.
    I used to be so optimistic but with JC every time I was looking forward to something or got my hopes up everything would fall apart. And if I can get the trailer and fix it up then I will own it and move it if I have to. It would give me a sense of security.
    What kind of style questions? You have me curious!


  5. ladywithatruck Post author

    Twistedheart, Marion, thankyou so much! I get misty eyed knowing people really care and wish good things for me. I do believe things happen for a reason and in their own time. Just because I think its the answer doesn’t mean it is. But God I sure hope and pray it is because i am tired of struggling. Its been two years since JC and I split, I feel its time to start the next phase. I don’t even
    mind continuing to struggle I just want a new challenge.


  6. WordsFallFromMyEyes

    Oh, if only I had 2000 friends who are porn star dudes… VOMIT!!

    Love hearing about your stuff, Carrie. When you described jumping into bed with all your clothes on because it’s too cold, & listening to the rain…. I could so picture it.

    I understand you being so tired of struggling, my gosh I can so relate to that. HERE’S to a turn of the corner for us both. 🙂


    1. ladywithatruck Post author

      Thank you Noeleen, I am sure you can relate to the struggling. It seems some people spend their lives struggling and others float through life. I don’t even want to float but it would be nice to keep my head above water for awhile. I think it is our time Noeleen, I feel it; good things are coming.

      as for the 2000 (or more) “friends” on his FB, he had movie stars and singers also that he thought really were his friends and he would brag about having Clint Eastwood, as a friend or famous performers. He had women from all over the world and would use a translate app to talk to them. He thought he was so studly until I told him he was making a fool of himself and I was embarrassed to be on his FB and took myself off.
      Pitiful really.

      Thanks for stopping Noeleen, always good to see you.


      1. WordsFallFromMyEyes

        HA. De-friending HAS to be so embarrassing for someone like him. Good on you, Carrie – for knowing who your friends are NOT.


  7. Yikes

    As crazy as it sounds (and it always sounds crazy when you are describing your “relationship” with an N), FB is what broke us up in the end.

    First of all, I didn’t have one. But he did. No biggie. But he refused to say that he was In A Relationship. Really? So you want daily pics and videos (we were long distance and we’d met once with plans to meet again in Jan) but you don’t want to claim me? You want me to hear about the “idiots” at your job for an hour, bu you don’t want to claim me? You want me to TRUST you, but you don’t want to claim me?

    Get outta here!

    Oh and I can totally relate to the girls and all of the little Likes for pics that they put up or stupid quotes that HE put up. His ex was a friend on there and when he came down to see me I told him that it was inappropriate (and not because she was an ex, but because she was an ex that he claimed he could have if he “wanted to”…so yeah, chica had to go). He DID delete her and a couple of other questionable “friends.” Only for one of them to mysteriously return and he didn’t know how that happened.

    The thing is, if we had a ton of good-looking men as friends they would have gone ballistic. But it’s an N world and we’re just living in it.

    I will say this, stay off of his FB. Heck, if you can deactivate your own that would be best because for whatever reason FB tends to save every person you have ever friended and put them in your sidebar. Just too much temptation.

    And what is up with these Ns and their “highly religious” family members? Especially when the N is no saint? Why are they so concerned with what their family members (some that they don’t even talk to) think? Appearances, appearances.



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