This Is a Real Truck-Not a Wannabe Truck

I'm loving it.

So this is my truck I drive everyday. It’s a big truck and believe it or not I hauled in 2 loads a day the first week I worked. (last week, just a load a day) but you know what? Whether its two loads a day or 1, my pay cheque will always be the same and THAT is a huge relief. I had a little adjustment time getting used to the gears on the truck, it’s a 6-speed manual transmission. There is a VERY steep hill when you are coming into Mission, I hate to admit the first 3 times I attempted the hill I had to stop 1/2 way; find low gear and crawl up. Horribly embarrassing!! I love my job!! Nothing has really changed except my stress level has dropped by more than half. I still push myself because I am just that way. The company has an Alaskan cruise on the block for the buyer who brings in the most money but like I told my boss; I don’t need incentives to do well, I compete against myself. I am my hardest task master. They were a little confused by me at first; I got the truck and no one saw me for two days. You see if I am working down Surrey way I take my load to Amix, just like I used to. My company sells their steel to Amix anyway so it saves them the handling and shipping costs if I take it in directly. That way it is easier for me to get two loads a day in too if I have a big job. They are used to guys who punch a clock, whereas I go until I’ve got a load on which means might not get home until 9-10 at night and start a bit later the next morning. They understand now and the proof is in the scale tickets. I am feeling very confident in my new position and feel appreciated by my bosses and co-workers, and I am so extremely grateful for the job and it is so nice that every one I tell is do happy for me also. Everyone knows how hard I’ve struggled, I think it is the first time in my life I have ever gotten so much positive feedback all at on time; and it feels great!! I find myself getting hugged alot lately. I got my new laptop on Friday and my first pay cheque. Its been over twelve years since I had a pay cheque and it felt mighty nice to know every two weeks I am going to get well over a $1000 clear. I have a fuel card, they pay for my work clothes, gloves, tools, boots, safety gear, log books, cell phone, etc. All I have to worry about is my rent, food and entertainment; and for a little while paying back everyone I owe money to. The mechanic at work, Colin, is the guy who walked me through what I needed to know about the truck etc said its a really good truck and to give it a week. He was positive that by the end of the week I would love the truck. Every day he would text message me, “So are you loving the truck yet?” And every day I would say I am “liking” it a bit more. I wasn’t going to admit to loving it! But finally last week I am broke down and told him,”ok, I gotta admit something to you, I love the truck!”. He just laughed and said I told you!!!


10 thoughts on “This Is a Real Truck-Not a Wannabe Truck

  1. What a brillaint story and so cheering. I hope, reading through the lines, that you are now able to live in a slightly nicer place, and eat more reliably and the rest of it. Could’nt have happened to a more deserving person in my view. It just goes to show, there is hope for all of us


  2. Dear Carrie, When I read your post today I just started crying because I am so happy for you. You now have a path. Your job, independence and self worth will continue to give you the confidence and security to move in a continuing positive direction. I kinow your blog helps me each day stay strong. We all owe this to you. Your struggles are not in vane nor or any of ours. You and we are all living proof there is more in life than pain.
    . Hugs Morgan


    1. Morgan, thank you so much! Yes I feel I am finally moving towards the light. For so long I only saw darkness, JC’s evilness overshadowing everything, its like they take the sunshine out of a person’s life, suck all the joy out of a person BUT there IS life, life with joy and sunlight after a narcissist if a person can just hang on long enough.

      There were times I felt like i was in quicksand being pulled deeper into the depths of his hell and now I am so appreciative of every kindness, I want to hug everyone who is nice to me.

      There were so many times I wanted to give up and every one here encouraged me and got me through.



  3. Good for you, Carrie!!!! There is a light at the end of that dark tunnel. You deserve all the BEST that life can bring you. What an inspiration!


    1. Ellie, yes there IS light! And lightness after a narcissist!! And I am so immensely grateful to be able to see it. I feel like Jimmy Stewart in “Its a Wonderful Life” at the end when he is running home and is so happy. I want to kiss strangers!! It is quite literally like being brought back from the dead.
      Thank you Ellie, your time will come!


  4. All I have to say is: Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It brightened my day to see that things are going well for you! You deserve it ! 🙂 🙂 🙂


  5. Carrie, this is WONDERFUL.

    My gosh, it is SO wonderful to hear you so well. Love your truck, your job, getting hugs, uniform paid for, great colleagues, keeping your own time & understood. This is just wonderful. It HAD to come. It could only come when you made the break, and now here it is.



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