I have to be honest, I am struggling with something and I thought maybe I should share it seeing as it does have to do with JC and “No Contact”.

Some of you may know that JC popped up a couple of months ago just to make trouble in my life and succeeded to a degree.

Here is a condensed recount of what transpired.

We have to go back to Feb of this year. I was living in this tiny holiday trailer, the only thing good about it was that JC didn’t know where it was. I didn’t have phone reception up there, if my phone did ring it would drop the call so I never answered the phone when I was at the trailer. When I got down to the Husky Gas Station I returned phone calls. So this morning in February I checked for messages and there weren’t any so I called the number back thinking it was a customer, but it went to JC’s voice mail. I didn’t leave a message and hung up immediately. my gut was telling me this can not be a good thing, why would he call, not leave a message and then not answer his phone. Below is an excerpt from a comment he made on my blog in January.

“Any techie can link up with the G P S in ur phone and track where you are….but then he would shadow your calls at the same time.”

I tried to not worry about it but I sensed impending doom.

A short time later I moved to Everglades and was not allowed to park the big company truck in the resort and had to park it on the side of the road outside the park. A few weeks after i moved Colin the mechanic was putting a new deck on my truck when he came up to me and asked if I knew anyone who would want to track me. He showed me a tracking device that he had found under my deck. Apparently they are very easy to attached, it would take seconds, and if a person hadn’t seen one before they would never know it was there, it was the size of a screw.

I had taken my phone to the Rodgers store and asked them if my phone was bugged and they said it wasn’t possible but now I asked Colin and he said most definitely, if the person has the same phone as you it is easier. The person just has to call your number and have you call them back as long as you don’t get a call in between the person will be hooked up to your phone and be able to hear and see everything you do whether you are on the phone or not. I know JC has the same phone I do.

In May I was called into the office at Ccon and told things were not working out, they had my final cheque made out and everything. I was shocked, I had issues I wanted to talk to them about and had been asking for a meeting for weeks, months and I had never had a job description, but I had no idea I was going to get fired without even a warning. I pushed as to why they were letting me go and they didn’t want to say anything at first and then one of the bosses said something about an anonymous phone call, the other boss gave him the death stare and he shut up. I asked “what phone call?” and they told me that I had been seen sitting in the company truck at the Husky Gas Station doing crack cocaine and drinking Mike’s Hard Lemonaide. I was blown away, I told them, “I don’t know what is going on but someone is lying to you.” They said it was a law enforcement officer who called and I asked why he didn’t arrest me then if that is what I was doing? They said he was a fireman. I said, “I have told you that I came from a very abusive relationship and you choose to believe an anonymous phone caller?”

they asked me to leave the office for a minute so they could talk privately and when they called me back in they made me an offer to finance a truck for me and I could pay them back with a percentage of what I made until it was paid off. I thought that was a great deal and started looking for a truck. I hadn’t enjoyed working for them any way and this gave me my freedom again. They wanted a 20 year old, some muscle bound guy that could hump steal 8 hours a day and bring in big loads, and customer service be damned and I can’t work that way.

It has bothered me ever since, who would call and lie like that? It didn’t even make sense, I lived 5 minutes from the Husky whether I was at the trailer or the cabin, why on earth would I sit at the Husky in broad daylight doing drugs and drinking when I could just go home? aside from the fact that I don’t look like a drug addict, act like one nor am I one but it is something that JC has told other people since we split up. But I had no proof……..until………

Some one on here said that they still checked their ex’s activity on the internet just to see what they were up to because knowledge is power and they didn’t trust their ex to not seek revenge even years later. I Googled JC’s most common username and up pops a blog he  has with WordPress, Titled “Disgusted with lady witha truck”

Below is the first post he wrote and in red my come back

“gimme a break!

I quit looking at Carries “ladywithatruck” blog long ago. Her whole premise of “surviving a relationship with a narcissist” and starting over “with nothing” is just so contrived and obtuse that I could not stand to even read it.

I left with a truck that was barely running and broke down the day after I moved. I had $5 and ½ a pack of smokes and moved into a trailer that was a friend of a friends who was a crackhead, (unbeknownst to me because I had never even looked inside the trailer and took my friends word for it being a typical guys place that just needed a woman’s touch) Here are pictures of the place when I moved in.

misc pic from camera 022

the entranceway roof

from phone sept 17 012

Bedroom

misc pic from camera 024

the nicotine stains on the walls

misc pic from camera 028

Laundry room

misc pic from camera 026

kitchen

misc pic from camera 029

cobwebs

I cried all night and Kato and I slept on the couch. I slept sitting up with my coat on because it was so dirty. I cleaned for a solid week. I wore two pairs of rubber gloves to clean the bathroom and it took me 8 hours just to clean the bathroom. The old guy who had lived there before me chain smoked and the owners mother had died 6 years prior and he hadn’t removed any of her possessions yet. He was a trucker who went away to work for 5 months and came home and did crack for a month twice a year.

kitchen after I cleaned

kitchen after I cleaned

 

 

bathroom after 8 hours of cleaning

bathroom after 8 hours of cleaning

 

 

I moved in at the end of November and had a tree  up for Xmas

I moved in at the end of November and had a tree up for Xmas

 

 

I got a new washer and dryer off of Craig's List that were in great shape

I got a new washer and dryer off of Craig’s List that were in great shape

 

 

living room cleaned

living room cleaned

I owed $10,000 for truck repairs and managed to pay off all of it except $3,000 in one year. At one point the fuel pump In my truck packed it In because JC had put dirty fuel in it. I had the shop put a new fuel pump in and JC called the shop and talked them into taking it out because he said he had one and would drop it off the next day. He did not drop it off for a week and when he finally did it wasn’t the right one and I ended up having to pay for having the fuel pump put in taken out and put back in. The whole time this is going on I can’t work and I’m so depressed I took a bunch of pills and called JC to ask him to take Kato in the morning. He never checked on me or called anyone to check on me, or call 911. Luckily I survived.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

His post continues

“It is like everything she ever wrote to me, and worse. Because now she ISN’T writing to me….so there is no boundary of truth involved. Now she can imbellish as much as she wants. Now she can totally invent new events, change time periods, omit anything and everything positive and good that I or anyone has ever done for her, and assign malicious intent to anyone she chooses with NO way for anyone to question her, correct her, or challenge her.

I don’t assign malicious intent to anyone but him and I have told the truth, once again a perfect example of a narcissist accusing the victim of exactly what he himself did.

Any question at all of her recollections is automatically deleted and derided. I remember seeing some innocent enough questions to why she was contradicting herself (her blog is a constant source of contradictions and complete opposite accounts) which were met with instant deletions, and her then commenting on the stupidity of those people, and her subsequent blocking of them on her blog, and in the end she took full control over comments….no comment is posted until she has homogenized it.

 I have one question, IF I did delete messages from readers how does he know unless he was the one to write them? How does he know I blocked them? the only person I have blocked any where is him. So that proves he has been in my blog trying to discredit me and is pissed he didn’t succeed, mind you on his blog he named me and my company and had comments set for moderation. I on the other hand do not name him or where he works so obviously do not have my blog in an attempt to destroy him or slander him, but with the intent of saving someone else from the pain I went through. His blog’s sole intent is to slander my good name and destroy my ability to earn a living.

Complete and utter control over the misinformation, and the ability to silence any questions or corrections before they are reviewed by her followers.What a fucking joke. And people are just lapping it up. Now she is canvassing for donations and really playing the woe is me card.

 Yes, after 2 heart attacks (women in domestic abuse relationships are 70% more likely to suffer from heart disease) and being let go because James made an anonymous phone call to Ccon, and considering I devote 4-8 hours a day to answering emails and comments plus writing posts if someone wants to donate I am very grateful. and if he doesn’t visit my blog how does he know I have a donation button?

She is still bullshitting about C Con….she got FIRED because someone caught her smoking crack in her company truck and phoned her boss. Good one! Some times concerned citizens are a godsend.

I told no one, not a soul about someone phoning Ccon because I was waiting to see what happened, I told them it was a lie and I thought it was my ex but I had no proof until he wrote this!! Now I know he did it because how else would he know?

Why am I posting his nasty posts? because I wanted to show how they twist the facts and fabricate stories just to destroy someone. He wrote this post just this past July 2013, we split up at the end of November 2010.  I have not contacted him in anyway in over a year. He is supposedly so happy with his new woman, there is no way anyone can Google his name and get a link to my blog but he is so vindictive he will cut off his nose to spite his face. Maybe he realized that because he has since deleted his blog. I have two other posts he did and I will post those shortly, they will show how they will be saying they love someone one day and the next ridiculing them.

I have to admit though, even all this time after leaving it still bothers me and I want to defend myself. That is how they get to you, he knew I would find it some day and he just can’t leave me alone; he literally has to destroy me in order to be happy and move on.

What a pitiful specimen of a human that is!!

27 thoughts on “They Never Give Up!

  1. LISA

    i just want to add your bravery,courage,and heart are inspiring to me. I do not except or promote this behavior from either men or women.Somewhere in their lives things messed up and their natural life messed up. They turned abusers at that moment and i am not a teacher.SO! My heart is my own, after only 3 years 3 months i, ME had had enough.Blessings to all.Hugs are great and LIVE< LAUGH <LOVE
    Lisa

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      Lisa, thank you so much. Any person but women even more so that survive a relationship with an N are brave and courageous; they just don’t know it until they get away… I actually believe they are born this way, there is a disconnect between their hearts and their brains, a birth defect or maybe they sold their soul to the devil in a previous life or something. But they are pure evil.

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  2. Linda

    First of all Carrie, never feel you have to justify yourself here. We know how they work and it is exhausting constantly justifying ourselves. Second, your ex isn’t narcistic, he’s a freaking psychopath!! Ignore him! He’s a liar and since he doesn’t have the truth on his side, he has to prove you a liar. The people that matter won’t listen to him or care! He wants you to react so DON’T!! But he sounds dangerous! Ever thought of changing your name so he can’t find you? Restraining order so he must stay away (and looking like the psychopath that he is when he’s caught stalking you). Moving far, far away? (Come to Canada :). )My heart goes out to you. My N is not dangerous, just a weak a**hole. Chin up girl, you have the truth on your side and everybody knows it. Those that don’t, don’t matter! 🙂

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      Linda, thank you so much, I do live in Canada already, in BC. Where are you? I think that this blog actually keeps me safe. I have told him that if anything ever happened to me he would be the first one they come looking for. He wanted to seal his criminal record when we got back together the last time and when he said that I thought, “THAT’s why you wanted to get back together, to talk me into leaving the past behind us and sealing our records so no one would ever know he had abused me.” I refused of course because I don’t have a record, the only thing that would come up under my name is the calls to the house for domestic violence and the restraining order I had on him years ago because he attacked my son and I. He wanted to make sure that wouldn’t come back to haunt him one day. With this blog if something ever happened to me, with the posts he’s made and his past behavior they would be after him in a heart beat.
      The thing is everything he has tried has turned out in my favor in the end any way. I had my heart attack right after I lost my job and I didn’t know why I was so tired all the time at work and out of breath. I wasn’t able to work as hard as I had on my own and I didn’t know why, now I do. But it gave me enough hours to get disability for awhile. If I hadn’t been working for Ccon I never would have gotten the cabin. so it all worked out.
      I don’t know how I lasted as long as I did with him, if it weren’t for his sister I probably never would have left. It’s THAT scarey!! and that is why I share it. I think I have built up some credibility and maybe people will be a little more understanding of women who get stuck in these kind of relationships. I had no one who understood and my family turned their backs on me putting me right into JC’s hands on a silver platter.

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  3. Peacelily

    It sounds to me like this little boy is worried. Good. Why would he go to the effort of setting up a copy cat blog on the same site as you if it isn’t because he is scared of the truth and his reputation? Let him sweat. Keep ignoring him. Keep living your life. Keep being amazing and creative and an excellent blogger! Hugs from the UK!

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      thanks so much Peacelily, I am doing just that, keeping on moving on. I have never been happier in my life than I have been in 12 + years. and I know he hates that. He wanted me to be like his other ex who drank herself to death and never got over him. He loved that. I am so over him and so on to him and he knows his family loves me and friends see him for what he is so he can’t handle it.

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  4. ellie2013

    First of all Carrie, he is not happy. No HAPPY person holds on to the past like that. I believe ( and you know this ) that when we leave them, call them out, it , in their mind, is being exposed. A narcisstic injury. No one knows what precipitated the blog. Perhaps M catching on to his ways which he blames you for? HE has to blame someone. You tell it like it is, he tells his own stories. They are going to be opposite. They HAVE to be. I believe the need for revenge runs in an N as deep as their evilness. There is nothing we can do to stop them wanting revenge I am afraid. Just be alert and pray.

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      You are right Ellie, revenge is all part of the narcissist, that is why they always try to destroy you before they leave, they simply can not handle you having anything or being happy without them. If you attain anything they feel they are missing out, they want to take it away from you even if they can’t have it, at least you won’t either. that is why after we broke up he tried to make me lose my truck. He called me and had me meet him after we split, he said he had to change my tranny fluid. He was on time and had supper for me and I was suspicious right away because he was being nice. well I know why when I went to leave. My truck would not go over 5 miles an hour. I told him and he said he had to go home but call him if I had trouble, I said I didn’t have to call I could tell him right now, I am in trouble. He left anyway and I tried to limp it home. I didn’t make it and it ended up getting towed and I didn’t have enough for the tow charges. I got hold of him the next day and he said he didn’t know why he hadn’t heard his phone, but he said he would pay the towing charges when he got paid in a week. Of course it never happened. It was in there about 3 weeks when JC called and said he had a “buddy” who was willing to buy the truck for the price of the tow charges. I would have gotten nothing and you can bet JC would have ended up with my truck. I told him, “I will let the tow yard have it before I let any friend of yours get it.” It was at the tow yard for a full month and they were going to sell it in a couple of days so I called JC’s step dad and told him I was going to lose my truck. He said no JC told him he was going to get it out, he said, “Hasn’t he done that yet?” I told him no and he came from Sechelt the next day, picked JC up from work and got my truck out. He hated that I had a nicer truck than him, it wasn’t too bad while we were together but he didn’t want to me to have it. Even with Kato, he kept bugging me to breed Kato because he wanted a puppy, he bugged me for months and I thought he just wants a dog like Kato of his own to take with him when he leaves. Kato always got so much attention and he liked that, I refused to breed Kato until after we split.
      Like a 3 year old in an adult body.
      Thanks Ellie
      Hugs
      Carrie

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  5. Paula

    Carrie, this blog has made more of a difference to me than you can ever know. I know you want to defend yourself against his accusations and lies, and what I’m going to say ie much much easier said than done, but here are my thoughts: let this blog defend you, ignore (the best you can) what he has done-he is doing that because he knows you are the ‘winner’! The world agrees with YOU, and he doesn’t even have the ability to understand why. His ONLY defense is to discredit you. He is such a NARC that he can’t even play the game-narcs can only be the little person and play pettily. Bravo to you, Carrie!! You are a real person with real person feelings like love, friendship, compassion, and caring. He will never be human enough to have that. Keep up the good work that you are doing that helps the rest of us get through our days of NC, narc drama, abuse, depression, loneliness…..all that goes with falling for an N! We NEED you!! No one needs him!

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  6. Connie

    Lol….what a fuck. Those are the only words I have for him. Pathetic. Oh, and he can’t spell. That drives me nuts. Just a total fuck. Pardon my french ladies.

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        1. Carrie Reimer Post author

          Connie, thank you. I have been sitting on all this stuff since I found it in the middle of August, telling myself I would not let it get to me. I for sure wasn’t going to respond on his blog, I didn’t want to increase his traffic. LOL I think that is what bothers him the most is he thinks of it in the way that I have control over the people who come here and he wants that kind of control.
          In his sickness he doesn’t understand why I would have all these people coming to my blog because he tells lies and no one listens to him. He doesn’t understand that lies are not the same as the truth because in his mind the truth is only as good as how well you lie. One time I was angry because on the way to see me on New Years he had sent text messages to two other women saying he loved them and would miss them on New Years Eve. He was dumbfounded, why was I so upset, I wasn’t with him at the time. I said so when we aren’t together, if I am not right there beside you you feel you can do whatever you want? He really looked confused. When he forgot to sign off my laptop and i discovered he had been talking to all these other women he said. Everything was fine until you snooped. for one thing I didn’t snoop, he forgot to sign out, but he thought everything was fine because while he was out of town he called diligently to tell me he loved and missed me and I was believing him so it was all ok. Its hard to even explain his way of thinking, I could kinda understand his train of thought because in a sick way he was right.
          Anyway, I got hugely sidetracked!! it has been eating away at me, that he has the audacity to tell blatant lies and I didn’t take him to court for slander. I just thought it wasn’t worth the money and stress to do it, but its obviously been gnawing at me. I have been having nightmares about him. I hate that he can still get to me like that, but it is not that I love him, its that he can cause me grief and to be honest, scare me. I am afraid of what he is capable of.

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  7. Kelly

    Carrie,
    Hold your head up high and move forward. They attack hardest when they feel threatened. For this level of attack look at how much success you have!

    As hard as it is, shrug your shoulders and move forward! He is misery and misery loves company, but you don’t have to take part.

    Carrie, you are a wonderful person! You will over come this!

    Hugs,
    Kelly

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      thanks Kelly, I certainly would never contact him, and I consider the source but it is scarey how low they will go. I of all people shouldn’t be shocked or surprised by anything a narcissist does but to jeopardize a person’s income is so low and vindictive and that isn’t the half of what he was saying. but the thing that bothers me is for the past 4-5 nights I he has shown up in my dreams. I hate that!! I wake up disoriented and just feeling crappy. It makes me nervous because usually when I get a “feeling” he is up to something.
      I am not depressed or anything. thanks you for the vote of confidence. I really appreciate it, and yes I will overcome this too just like everything else.
      Hugs
      Carrie

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  8. not alone

    One of my mom’s favorite tactics in public forums. She loves to tell her story, her victories, ,her revelations. The abuse is that it’s our word against theirs, but they’ve isolated so far, made us the problem, and collected such a following that their words are widespread and taken without question — therefore we have no word to stand on. That’s one tool my mom uses to try to make me feel hopeless that anyone will believe me. and the harsh reality is that they don’t believe me because they are so taken in by her lies and manipulation. That is so hard right now.
    Her biggest mistake (or how I figured out that it wasn’t my fault): after my dad’s death she ended up projecting all of herself onto my uncle (her brother) and she thought that I was on her side; however I am very objective and tend to give people benefit of doubt, so I contacted him to sort things out and make things right. In the meantime she began playing my uncle and me against each other in her correspondence to each of us, (all of this over the house we were living in but it turned out to extend far beyond). She didn’t know is that we were communicating with each other and the benefit was that we were on the exact same page about what was going on. Also – relevant sidenote – she hates my husband and doesn’t give him any thought of existence, doesn’t realize that he is a PERSON with his own perspectives and he was seeing exactly the same thing as us. However, my mom told everyone that there were SOOO many sides to the story that no one could be blamed or were at fault for the devastation and difficulties that that seems to have happened and that I just need to get my life sorted out and get better and stop acting like a victim of my circumstances (!!). Okay, so NOW that I realize what is going on . . . I have gotten her SORTED OUT of my life and I am getting better and I am able to act like a SURVIVOR (as much as I possibly can, unless she spontaneously shows up at places or sends me a letter in the mail — still working on that.)

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      not alone, it will come, give it time. its hard when they pop up out of the blue, it seems they just can’t handle not having conflict and drama all the time!!
      Good luck and thanks for commenting
      hug
      Carrie

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  9. DIANE

    Carrie,
    He is so evil and never defend youself to us. All this crazy making still after all this time…can you imagine what his current victim is going through. Do not even give him the time of day…he get’s off on hurting you..just always be careful

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      Diane, thank you, yeah I have been thinking about his current victim, I am sure there is trouble in paradise and she is starting to wonder what she walked into and if maybe I am not the psycho bitch he says I am.
      hugs
      Carrie

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    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      Safirefalcon,
      Thank you, I sure worked hard but it looked great when I was done. I had two loads for the dump when I was done, just stacks of garbage every where and pots with food in them, pizza boxes with pizza left from God knows when it was a wonder the place didn’t have mice and rats. But I had my buddy kato and he can smell a rodent right away and didn’t so I felt pretty safe in the way. the place had been infested with bedbugs too!! but it had gotten so hot in the trailer in summer they all died but the corpses were everywhere. yuck!! gawd it was gross. the tobacco stains running down the walls and when i moved pictures the wall was light beige and the rest of the wall was brown. I put up nice curtains, painted the place, it really looked good.
      The owner said when he walked in for the first time when he came home for Christmas he walked in and almost turned around because he thought he had walked into the wrong trailer.

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      1. safirefalcon

        Lol to he “walked in and turned around thinking he walked in to the wrong trailer.
        That is crazy hard work to put into a place. It’s unreal how much people can smoke as to stain everything. I had the thought of cockroaches as I was reading too. Yuck. Gives me shivers (and not the good kind) thinking about those things.

        I remember having to clean up a dirty house once, including scrubbing walls but I was not close to this bad.

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