My apologies to anyone who got a notification of a new post and either there was only 1/2 a post or no post there. I had this idea that I thought would be easy. Haha it has been a nightmare! This is my last try at it and if it doesn’t work you will never see this.
Every day WordPress gives it’s bloggers their stats for the day. The stats include the search terms people used to have your blog come up in the results. I decided to take the top 40 search terms for January 29th and answer each one briefly. Should be a simple copy and paste kind of thing you would think, but oh no! because it was a table and well…. I have been at this for hours!! too damn stubborn to just give up. So here we go one last time.
1. Narcissists changing with new woman – the narcissist does not change. He was too good to be true when you met him and he is too good to be true with the next woman and the next and the next. To a narcissist women are all interchangeable.
2. Narcissists apologize – A narcissist usually apologies in such a way that he is not to blame.
Ie: I should have had better control and not let you push my buttons until I hit you. Or I never would have cheated if you hadn’t been so suspicious. Until they think they have really lost you and then they will admit to everything and take full blame for it all, they will appear to really own it and you think, he has never owned it before he must mean it and take him back and then he abuses you worse than ever.
3. Do narcissists cry – See above, usually the “heart-felt” apology is accompanied with real live tears. When he first starts seeing a woman he is usually pretty teary, JC cried the first time he said I love you. Or in a situation where crying seems to him to be appropriate response and will garner him attention.
4. Narcissist woman relationship– same as a man, just as devastating, just as abusive,
just as hard to get over.
5. Hoovering narcissist – Narcissists hoover after they dump you. They make a huge deal about dumping your sorry ass because they just can’t deal with your drama and then when you finally start to heal and feel somewhat back to normal the narcissist will pop up out of nowhere expecting you to welcome him back with open arms, if you don’t he will hang around. Show up everywhere you are (stalk you) and act all suck holey until you finally break down and take him back and then he will abuse you worse than before.
6. Ladywithatruck – yes, well I used to be the lady with a truck until the N destroyed it.
But that is what many people know me by.
7. How long does the honeymoon phase last with a narcissist – That depends how long it takes him to feel he has securely hooked the woman, usually once they move in together, get married or he gets her pregnant but it can happen without any of those things occurring it all depends on him feeling secure enough to let his mask drop and know the woman won’t dump his ass.
8. Letter to son on 30th birthday – I am terribly proud of my boy and I couldn’t think of anything that I could afford to get him that would mean anything and I think everyone needs to hear, “I think you are a great person and I am so proud of the man you have become.” I don’t think a parent can ever say that enough no matter how old their kid gets.
9. How to recover from a pathological narcissist liar u tubes – no u tubes on my site but Sam Vaknin has some good ones and there are many other ones on |You Tube, I have watched many of them and most of them are very good.
10. Dating a man after being with a narcissist – I strongly advice waiting to date again until you have healed completely and done a lot of work on your self esteem, identified your boundaries and learned how to defend them and done enough research to know how to recognize the early warning signs you are with a narcissist. It is possible to pick them out if you are aware because they all follow the same MO. Idolize, devalue, discard.
11. Narcissistic partner abuse – Abuse – that is what a narcissist does, yes. Some types over lap. Let’s count all the different ways a narcissist can abuse you
Emotional– withholds affection, silent treatment, acts like he loathes you,
Financial – insists on managing all the money, bitches about how much you cost him and how much you spend, if you have money he wants it, if you have equity he wants it,
Physical – choking, slapping, punching, kicking, throwing things at you, forcing sex , hovering over you as if to hit you,
Psychological – gas lighting, tries to make you think you are crazy, denying things you saw with your own eyes or twisting things you said, changing history to suit his agenda, hiding things of yours, saying you are paranoid, crazy
Verbal – calling you stupid, ugly, lazy, a whore, slut, twisting things you say, denying what he said, using words to confuse you by using double meaning to words.
Control – tells you what to wear, think, and who to associate with, tampers with your vehicle to keep you from going out, gets you fired, refuses to take you to the doctor, refuses to buy groceries
Sexual – forces you to perform sex acts you are uncomfortable with or are painful, not taking no for an answer, rape, withholding sex, degrading treatment during sex or degrading remarks about having sex with you, some even force the woman to have sex with their friends, secretly taping sex with you, porn addictions,
Infidelity – with women, personal ads on the internet, with men, with God knows who and you probably don’t really want to know believe me. Just get tested for STD’s take my word for it.
Passive Aggressive abuse – which is very common with N’s and consists of destroying your property if he is angry with you, or stealing it, or selling it, preventing you from going to a function you have been looking forward to, forgetting your birthday, making you late or being late himself, not calling, total lack of cooperation.
I am not sure where to categorize these next few – hurts your pets or threatens your pets, children and extended family, smear campaign with everyone who knows you, falsely accuses you of things that are intended to make you lose your job, get arrested, put into a mental institute or have your children taken away, Intimidates you by say cleaning his guns,
sharpening knives, watching snuff movies, anything that would make you think your life is in danger but deny it if you say anything.
12. Narcissist stealing money – As stated in number 11, he wants all your money and everyone else’s money and possessions. He has no conscience so taking stuff is in his mind his right. It’s your own fault for not having it locked up or insured. He doesn’t like anyone to have more than him or even equal to him.
13. When will the narcissist end his relationship with the new supply– whenever she is on to his lies and starts confronting him on his shit, when he meets someone better, but once you have been “his” he reserves the right to pop back into your life whenever he wishes and you should be honored and grateful the he chose you to abuse again.
14. Breaking up with a narcissist – Good Idea!!
15. What type of woman does a narcissist like – narcissists don’t like women, they own them, preferably a woman that another man would want, he wants to be the envy of other men, but he also is looking for a strong self assured independent woman who he can break – good NS to bring a strong woman down, plus he would prefer she has something like a nice car, a nice home, money he can get his hands on, or maybe he thinks being with her will further his career, it really depends on what he needs at the time. A married woman is always good because then he gets to destroy a whole family.
16. Narcissist after cheating – smug, self righteous, indignant and blames you. If you think your narcissist isn’t cheating on you, you just haven’t caught him yet.
17. Narcissist wants you back – see #2, #3 and #5
18. How to revenge emotional abuse – don’t even try to get revenge. The man has no conscience, you can’t compete with that. He will always win in the revenge arena, he is the master of revenge, and there is no way you can really hurt someone if they have no feelings.
19. Narcissists cheat – see number 11 Infidelity and #16
20. Insane crap my husband says – yes, they are insane and say insane things, they all do…………because they are insane.
21. Apathy after narcissistic abuse – from him or from you? Either way, yes he doesn’t give a shit and after awhile you go into survival mode and denial and shut your feelings off. It is very common amongst survivors of all types of abuse, prisoners of war, kidnap victims, child abuse victims etc
22. Stealth narcissist – they are all stealth, sneaky and conniving
23. My wife says i am a narcissist – if it concerns you then the odds are you aren’t but you might want to check out the traits of a narcissist and see how she stacks up
24. My ex apologized for hurting me – an apology is only an apology if he never repeats the
behavior he apologized for
25. When times are good with a narcissist – you can be sure that a really bad time will follow because he feels he must make sure you don’t come to expect good times in the beginning and any time he thinks he has lost you or you have something he wants but you always walk on egg shells waiting for the other shoe to drop because its never good for long.
26. How does a narcissistic lure you in – obviously you have never been with a narcissist because anyone who has knows exactly how he lured you in. He pretended to be your soul mate, your perfect mate, and he acted like you were his, He LIED.
27. Cheating spouse says shut up leave me alone –you mean he didn’t tell you it was all your fault?
28. How to win back a narcissist – hahahaha I would hardly call that winning?
29. Can narcissists fall in love – hahahaha your kidding right? Sorry no they cannot fall in love, without empathy it is impossible to love. He wants you, he wants to own you, possess you, control you but there is no love. He can tell 10 different women he loves them in the same week, he can dump one woman one day and be with the love of his life that night.
30. Why do narcissist leave good women for their ex girlfriends – I am sure the ex girlfriend is a good woman also. See #1 and #5, also a Narcissist love love loves LOVES triangulation, having two women fight over him is the ultimate NS
31. Why can a narcissist feel empathy for others and not his girlfriend – the narcissist can FAKE empathy when it serves a purpose. That is what is so nasty about him; he knows how to act, he knows what a person needs, he just doesn’t give a damn.
32. How do i help my husband with narcissistic victim syndrome? Get him a good counselor who is trained and experienced dealing with victims of narcissistic abuse, not all counselors understand the depth of the abuse and can actually do more harm than good by giving advice that would work with as “normal” person or they blame the victim.
33. If narcissists leaves the state do they come back – maybe
34. Why do narcissists marry – to possess the woman, to get her shit, maybe it is the only way he can get control of her. Plus to a narcissist marriage vows mean nothing, he is not committing to anything past the 5 minutes it takes to say the vows. They will promise anything, say anything and never worry about being held to it because no one holds them to anything, they just do what they want anyway. Marriage means nothing to them, so why not get married if its going to get him what he wants.
35. Narcissist couldn’t care less about his family – Narcissist = self absorbed, they don’t give a shit about anybody
36. When the narcissist comes back – run in the opposite direction and cover your ears
37. I’m in love with a narcissistic but i have to leave him to save me – you got that right
38. Happiness with a narcissistic woman – not bloody likely
39. Narcissist die alone – it’s a nice thought but unfortunately many of them just carry on leaving a trail of destruction behind them perfecting their technique with each victim. Just think of all those lonely little old widows with all that money with his name on it.
40. Narcissist stealing friends – the narcissist will steal anything and everything he wants and that means your friends also, they want everyone to hate the victim and feel sorry for him and when he leaves you he wants to make sure you have nothing of value left, not even your self esteem or your friends who might help you recover.
They are downright nasty that way.