Lying and Wishful Thinking

from one year ago. There are a few new women emailing me right now that can benefit from this post

When I found out JC had moved in with another woman the thing that hit me hardest was; now he was lying to her. Crazy thinking I know but I had clung to those lies for so many years, they gave me hope, were the base for my wishful thinking; without those lies I had to face the truth.

The truth was ugly and I had been avoiding it with a vengeance for at least the last 2 years. The last few years I used to pray he would lie to me, tell me any feeble lie, just anything at all!! so I could lie to myself.

The nights he didn’t come home and didn’t answer his phone I didn’t pace the house any more, I didn’t fly into a rage, I was numb, I just prayed he’d tell me a lie. I had stopped snooping on his phone and…

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Email and Skype Support

Almost daily I receive email or messages on one of my other social media from a victim of narcissistic abuse requesting to speak with me privately. As much as I would love to be independently wealthy and able to help everyone free of charge I just can not. I don't have any secrets that I only share privately, everything I know about narcissists I share here for free. But if you feel you need one on one consultation I can be reached at reimerc@outlook.com to make arrangements for personal, private support for a fee. Please email me to discuss rates and what your needs are. I look forward to working with you on your journey back to the land of the living! There is life and light after the narcissist, I promise!! Talk to you soon.

DISCLAIMER

It has been brought to my attention by the police that my blog may incite violence. I want to make it perfectly clear that my intention was never one of revenge or violence against my ex. I have ensured to not put his full name in the blog and have used his first name or initials. Anyone can do a Google search on his name or business name and my blog will not appear anywhere in the search results. Interestingly enough his ad looking for sex does show up. I do not advocate revenge, a narcissist can always "one up you" in the revenge department because those with a conscience can not even think of the things a narcissist can and a narcissist must win at any cost. So why do I have this blog? Like the police officer said, "Most victims who are fearful of their abuser try to avoid making him angry." My reply was; You are right and the silence of the victim perpetuates the problem of domestic abuse and enables the abuser to continue. I promised myself that if I survived what I was going through I would spend the rest of my days raising awareness and sharing my experience in hopes I saved even one woman from suffering like I did. I refer to my personal experience because I want to be totally honest and open, which makes the people who come to my blog comfortable enough to share their experiences and know they are not crazy. I thought I was crazy, most victims do. I wanted to show that they are not alone and they are not crazy. My blog is not technical, I am not a counselor or mental health professional in any way. I am a survivor of domestic abuse by someone I consider to be a psychopath/narcissist. I had no idea what had happened to me, I have shared every step of my recovery and every bit of information I have found on narcissists and psychopaths; good and bad, in hopes it helps someone else. I blog in hopes of ending violence, NOT inciting violence! The police officer was very understanding, I wish I would have spoken someone like him years ago. I am all about not breaking the law, I didn't make it to almost 60 with a clean record by accident. When I asked the officer what I can do to appease the law and yet still retain my right to free speech he suggested I go through my posts and remove my ex's name and replace it with "My ex". I have started this process but with over 1000 posts it is going to take time. The officer said that someone reading my blog might get so upset by what I share that they decide to hunt down my ex and do him harm. I find it hard to believe someone would go to that extent. But there are nutcases in the world. Let me assure you!! I do not want anyone thinking I would approve of any harm coming to my ex. He really is not worth it!! I am far past any anger, I am at; meh! The man has taken enough of my time. This is not about him, it is about me raising awareness about a very serious issue that affects 1 in 4 women in North America and 1 in 3 women globally. According to my ex every woman he has ever been involved with is a psycho bitch C&%* and he has changed because he has found his soulmate. Personally, I had never been in an abusive relationship prior to him and I did not go running to another man to heal me after him. I chose to find out what happened to me, work on myself and educate myself so that it never happened again to me and so I could educate others. So that is what I intend to continue doing. Namaste Carrie

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Lady Witha Truck by Carrie Reimer is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. © Carrie Reimer and Lady Witha Truck, 2011-2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Carrie Reimer and Lady Witha Truck with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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