Since hitting 50 I haven’t recognized the woman staring back at me from the mirror, deep wrinkles, frown lines and just generally tired and drawn looking, no sparkle in the eyes.
I recently saw an ad on the net with Dr Oz from Oprah recommending a certain combination of creams that will reverse the aging process in a mere 2 weeks. The deal was; you get a free 2 week supply of the cream, if you don’t see a marked improvement in your looks you can send the product back but if you keep the creams you will automatically be sent a monthly supply at something like $75 a month. That works out to a hell of a lot of money!!
I have discovered an age reversing secret that is free, free forever!! and will more than likely SAVE you money!!!
It is a painful procedure, but you can do it right from your own home, don’t have to miss work, it requires no anesthetic or chemicals, no surgery and no one will know you had it done. But you will start to hear, “What did you do? you look different”, “Have you changed your hairstyle?” “Something is different about you”
What is my secret age reversing procedure? I will share it with you and I want you to tell everyone you know, it could revolutionize the world!!
LOSE THE NARCISSIST IN YOUR LIFE!!!!
I did say it is a painful procedure ……. but so worth it in the end!!
I used to be called “Smiley” or “Sunshine” by people. I love to smile, even on a down day I could always muster up a smile. The last two years with JC I noticed people weren’t calling me those nicknames any more and it didn’t matter how much time I put into making myself look nice I still looked tired and drained of life.
I don’t have any pictures of me during those last few years because I did look so horrible I didn’t want my picture taken, any that were taken I destroyed.
I remember once JC was on the bed flipping through photo’s and a picture of me popped up on the screen and I looked horrible!! It was a picture of me sleeping on the couch, I was shocked at how awful I looked and went to hit the delete button but he was quicker than me and flipped to another picture before I had a chance. I made him promise to delete it! I didn’t want anyone to see it.
It was a few weeks later I was putting clean clothes away and his laptop was on the bed automatically flipping through photos as a screen saver, when an amateur porn video popped up. I recognized JC’s back almost immediately and wondered who the hell he was having sex with. Then I saw the tattoo on my ankle and realized with a mixture of horror and relief that it was me. I rewound it to the beginning and it was that picture of me sleeping on the couch. I don’t know if I was more devastated that he had taped us having sex and it might be on the internet or that anyone would see me looking that horrible.
It was shortly after that, that I was loading the truck at a customers, it was Friday night and the guys were drinking beers. One of the fellows drags his buddy out of the shop and they stood there. I went about my business of loading the truck, when I turned back for another load the guy said, “See, what did I tell you? Great ass, right?! huh! didn’t I tell you?” The guy agreed. I blushed and said something sarcastic (if you are a lady scrap hauler you get used to guys making crude or rude comments and just laugh it off). then the guy asked how old I was and I said 53 (I was proud of the shape I was in for my age, but what he said next burst my bubble) He said,” From the back you look 35 at the most” (the other guy interjected “30” )and then you turn around and bam! 55″ He continued “35-55” (the other guy “30”) “30-55” “30-55” all the while demonstrating what he meant by turning one way and then the other. I forget what I said, I just remember being mortified.
People started complimenting my ass more and more, I think because it was the only attractive thing on me, I stopped hearing that I looked nice or pretty.
The longer I am N-free the younger I look and the more I get told I am looking really good. People are asking me if I did something new to my hair, and they are smiling at me more and I realized I am smiling more without being aware I am doing it instead of reminding myself to smile.
I have noticed a similar transformation has occurred with Paula, (sorry Paula no insult intended) from Paula’s Pontifications. When I first started visiting her blog (we have been away from our N’s about the same amount of time) I thought she was an attractive woman but recently I have noticed she is absolutely stunning and looks younger than she did 2 years ago.
What really convinced me I was on to something was the other day when I saw a couple of pictures of JC’s new woman. I have never thought she was an attractive woman, (probably sour grapes on my part) but I was shocked at how old she is looking. She looks like she has been crying for days, or not slept for days, her smile is forced, she has more grey hair and everything about her just looks tired, strained and well………… she looks like I felt the last two years I was with JC and she is only in the first 2 years. She is 6 years younger than me and she looks every bit as old as me if not older. But what really struck me were here eyes, they are almost pleading, it really bothered me, it made me remember the pain and I wouldn’t want my worst enemy to feel that kind of pain (well I would wish it on JC, but that’s the only person)
I had noticed with JC that he often took pictures of me at my worst and always took pics of himself at his best, posed, looking cool playing his guitar, on his motorcycle, taking his shirt off over his head to show his 6 pack, staring pensively off into the distance. Me? it was the first thing in the morning, when I had been cleaning house all day or when I was covered in grease or mud. He also would offer to take me out to eat at the end of the day after work and I would say I was dirty from work and really should change first and he would always say, he was grubby too and he was really hungry and lets just meet at the restaurant. I would concede and 9 times out of 10 I would get there looking like I hauled scrap all day and he would be dressed in clean clothes and looking great. I think he initially liked showing me off because he thought I was pretty but after time I think he liked it when he looked better than me. It certainly put him at an advantage and it eventually ate away at my self-esteem. But in reality, I got a lot of attention when I was at work, grubby or not, when a person is happy it doesn’t matter how they are dressed, their beauty shines through but the eyes don’t lie and stress will distort a person’s looks to the point of them not even looking like themselves.
They say eyes are the window to the soul and I believe that to be true. A person who is broken inside losing the sparkle in their eyes, the life is literally sucked out of them, their smile is forced and their foreheads are creased. I have noticed the same look in others eyes. When my first husband had his motorcycle accident and spent 10 weeks in ICU at VGH clinging to life, suffering the worst physical pain imaginable; his eyes lost their usual sparkle like a POW. You just had to look at him to know he had suffered. Just like when you see pictures of prisoners of war, sure their bodies show the ravages of torture and starvation but their eyes are what always stand out to me, you see their pain in their eyes, the eyes have always given me the chills. The eyes speak of a pain and horrors to horrible to put words to. The eyes show a person broken inside, a person who is still alive, walking, talking, smiling but inside they are dead.
I would be interested to hear from other survivors if they have noticed a drastic change in their appearance and if they have noticed they are looking younger and getting more compliments.
Just another benefit to losing the N in your life. While you are going through the pain of the discard just keep telling yourself that you are getting younger by the minute and his new woman is aging just as fast or faster.
The proof and the before picture is only from a year ago I looked worse 3 years ago. and a picture taken a couple of weeks ago.
I think everyone at one time or another thinks, "If I only knew then what I know now." I share my life experiences in hopes a few less people have to look back and want a "do over". Through my Lady Witha Truck blog I have spent 8 years sharing my experiences while being in an abusive relationship with a man I consider to be a narcissist/psychopath and through my other blog, Reimer Reason I share lessons learned throughout the 60 years of my life. No experience is a waste as long as you learn from it and if I can save someone else making the same mistakes I made, then it makes it all worth while.
I am an expert on my life, not yours, my opinions are my own, not yours, and I enjoy open respectful communication on most topics. If I don't have an answer I will research it until I do.
I have a sweetheart of a dog named Stella, a 4 year old Pitbull, Mastiff cross. I am artistic, enjoy bringing new life to antiques, gardening, refurbishing and repurposing other people's "garbage", reading, writing and being outside in nature.
I have a 34 year old son who I am extremely proud of and a 7 yr old granddaughter I don't see near enough.
I live on welfare after a lifetime of working full time because I have heart failure. I have gone from being a home owner and landlord to being homeless and living in my car.
I continually strive to be the best me that I can be and look at life as a learning experience and an opportunity to learn about other people and myself. Never a dull moment!
View all posts by Carrie Reimer