When Did He Stop Treating You Like A Princess?

what kind of mancartoon abusedisney princesssnow wihteI came across these “cartoons” today, check out the story here.

There seems to be such an effort being made by so many to raise awareness of domestic abuse and dispel myths etc, more victims speaking out, police taking the responsibility to lay charges when the woman refuses, shelters, fund raisers, even welfare in BC puts a woman on fast track if she has left an abusive relationship, yet more women are dying. Why is that? Less reports of abuse and more deaths. That is not the result expected nor wanted. In BC the cases of domestic homicide are being called epidemic.

Just recently in Houston I believe, a guy went to the home of his ex dressed as a Fed Ex courier and held the kids at gun point until the parents got home and he shot and killed all 6 of them, 4 14, 7, 9, and one 15 year old girl, also one of his children, although critically injured managed to call 911 and inform the police that the guy was heading to her grandparents to kill them next and they were able to intercept him before he got there. The police said he was “cool as a cucumber” when he was apprehended. 

Not long ago in my town a man beat his ex wife and stole the baby, in Langley the ex broke into the house in the middle of the night, set it on fire and tried to kill his ex wife, the daughter woke up went in to tell her mom the house was on fire and walked in to see her father trying to kill ehjr mom. She got injured trying to save her mom and by some miracle the mom, daughter and a little boy managed to get away to safety. Every week there is another domestic abuse near miss or death. Why? Is it because people are speaking out? Do the women feel supported in leaving and then not protected enough? Would these women have lived had they not left their abuser? Are we encouraging women to leave abusive relationships and then not giving them the protection and attention they need to stay safe? Do these women have a safety plan? I doubt it, 

Unfortunately fairy tale romances are just that, fairy tales; but I don’t think people are really “getting” it, there is a disconnect, people can not seem to accept that abusive men are dangerous, that a woman is NOT over reacting when she says she fears for her life, I am not being melodramatic when I tell women to formulate a safety plan. I have a feeling that society has become aware enough about abuse to advise women to leave, the police are trained to make arrests even if the woman won’t press charges, we as a society are getting better at saying, “No one deserves to be hit” and telling women to leave and I suppose there are more resources for women leaving an abusive relationship. But are the women being educated on what they are actually dealing with? Do they really know the danger they are in? I seriously doubt it.

So many women leave and are expected to find a job, get over it, move on, just forget it ever happened and feel that if a couple of weeks have gone by and they are still crying there is something wrong with them. We give zero time for them to heal. They have just had their self worth tromped on, they are physically, emotionally, financially, and mentally destroyed and what help do they get? If they don’t have family and happen to have kids the problem is 10 times worse.

I believe victims of abuse need to be educated on narcissists and the danger they are in. I think all victims of abuse should be given financial support long enough that they can recover and get strong before they have to deal with looking for work on top of everything. I think the victim needs an advocate who will fight for her cause and demand that she be heard and that a parent that beats and abuses a woman should not be given unsupervised visitation with the children, ever. 

All abuse victims should be given a security system for their home and taught self defense and all the children should be given training in staying safe. One of those children opened the door to the man who once was their dad and the 15 year old tried to close it on him but he over powered her. That 15 year old is a hero, the poor thing, clinging to life and her whole family slaughtered in front of her eyes. My heart breaks for her. It is a shame we can’t trust a parent to not harm his children and that children should have to deal with fearing that their parent might kill them, but it is a fact of life these days and personally I would like to see the children alive. 

Fairy tales are fun stories, but that is all they are, a story, make believe, the truth is very ugly. 

I can’t get the thought of those poor children being held waiting for their mom and step dad to get home knowing they were all going to die. 

They say things get worse before they get better, I hope this is a sign that we are on the verge of ending domestic violence and we’ve got the abusers running scared and have to ramp up the forces and stay strong. Not back down, take responsibility for our own safety and ensure the safety of our children. 

4 thoughts on “When Did He Stop Treating You Like A Princess?

  1. anon

    Carrie, I believe the guy with the Fed Ex shirt showed up to the home of his ex-wife’s sister demanding to know where his ex wife was. From what I read, the sister had been instrumental in helping her sister flee this abusive man and start over in another town or state. So, it was his ex-wife’s family that he killed because they would not tell him where she went. I bet the ex-wife wishes he had found her instead for who would want to live with that guilt for the rest of their life? This PSYCHOPATH probably knew that would kill her worse. Sick F#CK I hope he rots. Sorry, I know I am with sin, too, as we all are…but when does this sort of stuff STOP?


    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      anon, thank you for the correct info. I was confused by the news article I read. It said that all the kids were his and I assumed the man and woman killed were the mom and step dad. What a sick son of a bitch. He wanted to wipe out her whole family so she would have no one. That is the sickest, more cruel evil thing a person can do. Don’t say sorry, none of us are with that kind of sin!! He needs to die a slow painful death.


  2. Hank

    This cartoon campaign is one-sided and irresponsible. For instance, where are the Disney kids beaten to pulps by their mothers, since “Domestic Violence Can Happen to Anyone” and mothers are statistically more prone to abusing their children?

    Instead, it takes the misandric approach that men are the domestic abusers and women the sole victims. That’s irresponsible. Women assault men; women assault children; women abduct children; and women instigate violence. To dismiss it as “When Prince Charming Attacks” is so absolutely unfair to the men and children who deserve a voice in this discussion.


    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      Hank, you are right that there are female narcs and they cause just as much damage as their male counterparts and I certainly have met male victims of a female narcissist who are going through hell. I never mean to imply there aren’t male victims and I know there are not as many resources for the male victims as there are for the females. There are way more female victims though and far more deaths of females than males. Domestic homicide is the leading cause of death for women in Canada, one in 3 women will be abused at some point in her life. It is an epidemic and so i do tend to focus on the female victims more and it is what I know, what I experienced and the support I tend to supply for the simple reason I just don’t have the time to cover the both. Most of my posts pertain to either sex I just use the term “he” because it is easier to type than he/she or the narcissist.
      This is not a battle of the sexes, it is a fight against the exploitation people suffer at the hands of a narcissist and you must admit we raise our girls to believe in the knight in shining armour which helps the narcissist in securing his target. There are many ways society enabled the narcissist this is just one way. i have covered how the male victims get sucked in in other posts.



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