My open letter to the Baltimore Ravens @Ravens

Paula did it again!! This woman knows how to write!

Love—Life—OM

Full story available on CDN: http://www.commdiginews.com/life/open-letter-to-the-baltimore-ravens-from-a-survivor-of-domestic-violence-23302/


rice Dear Ravens Organization:

I am a native of Maryland and grew up in the small, mountain town of Cumberland in the western, Appalachian region of the state. I was an honors student and cheerleader. High school football was a major part of the community connectivity, and like many in my home town, I loved the energy of any given Friday night in the fall under the Greenway Avenue stadium lights rooting for my fellow classmates on the field.

When I was a senior, I dated a local football star, who was a member of the 1988 High School Class 2A Maryland Championship Football team. I thought he had integrity and pride. After all, it had been ingrained in me that star athletes possess a high degree of integrity and determination and respect for themselves and others. How else could these players be as successful…

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9 Replies to “My open letter to the Baltimore Ravens @Ravens”

  1. Great letter. The whole country should back her on this. I don’t understand why this guy got off so easy! He should never be let near her again. Horrific footage. Never heard of the guy or this incident. Shocking.

    Just wondering what she thinks when she sees herself in this video. Or what her children will be thinking about her descisions if this happens again, with a worser outcome.

    I sometimes wonder if some of us were born on the wrong planet. Are we stupid? Is this a dog eat dog world after all? Sure is starting to look like it to me.
    I don’t want to be on guard all day and everyday. Maybe I’m wrong and I need to be. Okay, need a lie down now.

    Like

  2. Hi i just discovered your site! I’m shivering! It feels you are writing about me! I also am 56 , one very big difference, my N/P is 28
    We are together since 47/19
    And i’ m in a cheating relationship! This guy was to take me away, i would leave my loveless,childless, abusive marriage! Guess who abused me more? And who is taking money from me? I have lost all my savings more than 75 thousand$ and he has pawned my mother’s antique gold jewellery for another 50 thousand.
    I know i,m a cheater but I’m glad i didn’t leave home, atleast I have food n a roof over my head
    I don’t feel guilty towards my husband for the fact i fell in love, cause i thought i was genuinely loved, only feel guilty for having to hide it!
    I always related the narcissist with the mythological Narcissus , i didn’t know what people like these are called! Liars, cheats, MAD!
    I couldn’t find a comments section on welcome page! I dont have te nerves to go beyond that right now!
    God bless!

    Like

    1. NM, Welcome, I am glad you could relate to my blog. It’s strange because my ex had a long term relationship with a much older woman prior to being with me. She was a neighbor in small town Sask, he was something like 13 and she was in her 30’s. She eventually did leave her husband and James moved with her to the states and was with her for something like 15 years and then one day he just hopped on a plane and left, luckily she had a very wealthy father who took care of her because James lived off of her for all those years and I am sure he left her in financial straits.
      They find it especially gratifying to be with a married woman because to them it shows their superiority over another man. They have no loyalty to their gender, they really are the scum of the earth.
      Most people do not realize the depth of depravity these people reach. I too had a vague recollection of that mythical guy narcissist who fell in love with his own reflection, a “harmless egocentric”. James did not fit the description of what I considered to be a narcissist. I pictured your typical car salesman, loud, obnoxious, full of himself and braggart. I had no worries about getting hooked up with someone like that, any guy like that was a total turn off to me. I didn’t know people like james existed. I know you hear about them on the news, or see movies about them but I could not relate it to my life.
      It is very hard to get your head around the evil.
      Hugs
      Carrie

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  3. Thanks for your reply!
    I know you would only advise me to get out while I’m still sane and alive, and haven’t burnt my bridges. Its not quite so extreme i think he is a narcissist in many ways but the major problem is he is delusional about his abilities, and he wants to get rich quick, without having to work for it! Rest as your reply above indicates, sooner or later this guy would leave me anyway, he is not satisfied, i,m already 56+’, have no energy for ‘many’ things he wants as a 28yr old….
    I guess your ex was younger to you too…as far as i can make out!
    No one can help here…
    If he was ‘normal’ maybe he wouldn’t have fallen in love with me, or he knows me from his past life, and i met him when i was younger!
    I think you would advise me to get out….any chance we can make it last? I’m just terrified if i finally move out to be with him, and my parents are dead, where would i go, i’d be on the streets!
    One option is to shift back to the foreign country where i lived 23 yrs before returning to my homeland,the city where i was born n brought up, where my husband was posted as an expat! He has retired recently and wants to go back again! In fact he has been living there for a month here a month there! Its unbearable to be with him 24 hrs a day! He has no friends, no life here except his siblings and their families!
    I have a brother here with family, but he has a very bad family life, he would divorce if not for the children n the wife would get our family home! But the thought of going back is terrifying, suffocating, as if i’d be going to my death! I wont get work at this age, i’ve lost my mind!
    Something for you

    https://in.lifestyle.yahoo.com/signs-karmic-relationship-183007461.html;_ylt=AgsYGhIwlx66biadrPx8qYq7YF1H;_ylu=X3oDMTE2ZGx1dWc1BG1pdAMEcG9zAzMEc2VjA01lZGlhQkNhcm91c2VsTWl4ZWRMUENB;_ylg=X3oDMTBhM285c21iBGxhbmcDZW4tSU4-;_ylv=3

    After your reply maybe i’ll shift to another page if you say so.
    Regards.

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    1. NM,

      I guess i should read all your posts first before responding but , and I am not being critical, honestly, but, I can not imagine being in a relationship with someones my sons age. I would immediately be suspicious of WHY in Gods name he was interested in someone MY age especially if I had money. I accept the fact that men go for “younger women” and I know it sounds sexist, but THAT is the way it is. Has always been. And perhaps it does not sound “right” but cougars women that date younger, much younger men , accept the fact that they KNOW the men are after their money, status, whatever. I do not think most actually see it as love, as least not a normal healthy love. I absolutely know my limitations, I am no spring chicken any longer and unless a guy has a mommy issue ( and he doesn’t need to be an N to have that ) I absolutely know he belongs with someone of his maturity level. Age, getting older teaches alot of lessons I am sure someone that young has not learned yet. Isn’t even ready to learn. I am sure it is a “compliment” to some to think that someone that young could be interested in, even maybe love them but again I would have to question WHY? What could possibly be in it for them? The sad cold hard truth is someday we ARE going to be older, and perhaps sick, needing care. How good are we going to look to them, then? How useful? Because it is about being useful, serving a purpose, especially with an N. We all need to stop fooling ourselves that perhaps we may not feel that way but there are a heck of alot of people out there that do. Sometimes what we percieve as love is just not enough to sustain a relationship.

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        1. I just want to say, there are past life connections, sometimes there are things beyond earthly age , i cannot explain it better than that, age never entered into our relationship, i dont want to justify anything, but its not definite he Is a N, just confused, he wants to explore the world, and he has full right to do so…

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Yes, we ALL have had that other worldly connection with our N’s. We all were the love of their lives, the answer to their problems ( and most of us were, money wise till they fleeced us out of it ) they loved us like no one else could, we were brought together by God himself. We were the ying and he was the yang, the stars had destined us to be together. HE had waited all his life for us to come along, there would never be anyone else like us. WE were meant to be , it was ordained. I am sure there were many more descriptions used , in variations , but all of the same theme. Ask any lady here. We all have heard them. WE were the only one. For a time. Until we weren’t. The thing is when they are saying that stuff to you, he is saying it to someone else too. It’s all magical thinking. It’s what hooks us. Makes us think he loves us when all he really wants is to use us.

            He wan’t confused when he took your 75 k was he? Or when he pawned Mom’s jewelry? Or when he cheated. Probably made him real attractive to the OW to have all that money. Compliments of you. Doesn’t matter whether he is an N or not. He is a user. And a cheat. A real asshole. But he is just confused huh? He doesn’t sound confused to me. Seems to me he KNOWS exactly what he is doing. Time maybe for you to open your eyes and see it for what it is. And specially for what it isn’t.

            Liked by 1 person

          2. NM, there was a 5 year age difference between James and I. and yes I was the older one but at 40 yrs old 5 years is hardly a significant age difference in my mind. When there are decades between two people they have totally different points of reference.
            Personally I could never find a young man 30 years my junior attractive but i don’t understand men in their 50’s finding a young girl attractive except for the ego boost of getting a younger woman. What on earth do they have to talk about? My mom and her 2nd husband have a 15 year age different but they met when she was in her 40’s and he was just about to retire and there was no apparent differences but now that he is almost 90 and she is only 75 the differences are HUGE. She has to do all the driving, they social life is greatly altered, he is 90! he is slow even though he took really good care of himself all his life and always was a very handsome man and she had many great years with him and is loyal to him and will take care of him in his old age it is a very real burden on her now.
            That is just the facts.
            You feeling that your were lovers in a previous life. I think every single woman in here thought THEIR love was special, different than anyone else’s, you love so much deeper and people just don’t understand because they have never felt love like this. You can’t even explain it, it is like it is out of your control, you have a connection that is undeniable.
            Been there done that! Sorry, but I have been there and you can deny it all you like and make as many excuses as you need to make yourself feel better but there is nothing special about it NM.
            About 5 years into the relationship I went looking on the internet for answers to James and my relationship. Back then there wasn’t as much information out there on narcissists but I found one site and they gave a list of traits. It was during a time of James rejecting me and I read those traits and thought, “That’s my answer! That’s what he is!!” But then jhe got nice again and I thought, maybe he has a lot of the traits but not all of them. He really loves me, these women just don’t understand, he and I have a connection that is unique and special. God brought us together, he loves me like no other. He is just confused, been hurt in the past and is afraid I will leave him so he pushes me away. He is insecure, all he needs is for me to love him unconditionally. No woman will love him like I do, no one could love him as much as I do and he will realize it and appreciate it eventually. I can’t stop loving him even if I wanted to anyway so I might as well just stay and keep loving him.
            I told myself that i didn’t care if he didn’t love me as much as I loved him as long as I could be in his life and allowed to love him I could survive on that. I felt my love was so pure and strong I could survive on it but he kept getting crueller and the deception worse and the abuse worse until the pain was greater than the love but by that time I was so destroyed and he had drained me of all my resources I couldn’t leave and start over. I ended up leaving with $5 and my dog. No furniture, no money, no business, no support system, my family had turned their back on me years prior, I had no friends because he had become ,my life. Did he feel any loyalty towards me for all I had given up for him, for all the years of forgiving and 2nd chances? Not on your life. He discarded me and told me I had made his life hell for 10 years and he had found the love of his life and she was nothing like me. I was a suicidal, ungrateful, paranoid, bitch that bled him dry.
            Believe me, I know all about lying and wishful thinking. The thing is with these guys is: yes they are cruel and they will destroy their victim but the most destructive and harmful thing about it, is the lies we tell ourselves.
            When james dumped me the last time he said, “You know it is your own fault I hurt you, you kept taking me back.” and he was right and it was a horrible pill to swallow. All the bullshit sandwiches he had fed me over the years and I always accepted 2nd helpings thinking he would someday realize how much I loved him and we would spend the rest of our lives together and now to be told I was worthless and no man would ever want a woman like me.
            Well, it was soul crushing.
            No matter how much you are hurting now, believe me there are depths of pain you have no idea about!!
            Good luck.
            Hugs
            Carrie

            Like

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