I watched this Fifth Estate program this morning about “The Making Of Jian Ghomeshi”, although it is over 45 minutes long I think it is well worth taking the time to view it. This is not about an abusive relationship, or a “love gone bad”, it has nothing to do with love, (but then neither did our relationship with the N) but it was abuse of women. It is so much more than that also, this video shows that it is not just the love struck who get sucked into their web, they do not put up the mask just with love interests, their lack of remorse, orchestrated lives affect everyone and everyone is susceptible to their charms and manipulations, men and women.
For those of you who may not have heard about Jian Ghomeshi the video is pretty self-explanatory, I know everyone in Canada knows who Jian Ghomeshi is, I am not sure how far-reaching his notoriety is, certainly not as far-reaching as Bill Cosby but he isn’t as old as Bill Cosby either and if it were 40 years ago he might have continued on undetected for many years, just like Bill Cosby did. But times are changing and women are speaking out and psychopaths are starting to fall, the only thing that gives these parasites power is the silence of others.
I watched with interest, listening to the people who were Jian’s bosses, the people who heard about the allegations against Ghomeshi and did nothing because they “didn’t have proof”, or I asked him about them and “he looked me right in the eye and said he had done nothing wrong.” As you watch this video notice how he orchestrated his life, carefully planning each move, how big name people loved him and admired him, he was well liked by many very influential, famous people. He made himself seem vulnerable by admitting he had anxiety attacks, he admitted to liking rough sex; he admitted to enough flaws in himself to appear open and honest, willing to be vulnerable; exactly what the psychopath does with his romantic conquests, he reveals just enough about his weaknesses and shortcomings to appear honest, “If he was honest about that, why would he lie about this?” They always reveal just enough truth that the lies seem believable.
Many people heard about the physical abuse of women, but no one had proof, no one wanted to falsely accuse him and ruin his career if they were wrong, they were afraid of repercussions if they spoke out, the victims felt no one would believe them over him because he appeared powerful and able to destroy them.
Notice how people who worked with him say he was emotionally abusive to the employees, refusing to take their calls or answer their emails if they didn’t do what he wanted. How he made them all wait, sometimes late into the night to give his approval of the script. If they didn’t secure famous enough guest for the show he gave them the silence treatment and they all knew he had the power to get them fired. Yet when he met someone knew he was charming, interested in knowing all about them, a real gentleman and approachable. Even to watch him he has an innocent almost childlike way about him, as if he doesn’t know what he is doing and yet everyone danced around him because they somehow knew he was dangerous and they didn’t want to piss him off. This quote of Ghomeshi’s shows why.
“People in this city need to understand that I have a long memory. You need to understand that and be very, very careful.”
—Disgraced ex-CBC radio host Jian Ghomeshi to Kevin Donovan, the Star investigative reporter whoworked with Jesse Brown to expose Ghomeshi’s history of alleged sexual violence. Donovan writes that this exchange took place in September, when event organizers seated him, apparently coincidentally, alongside Ghomeshi at a Toronto International Film Festival dinner party.
Ghomeshi, like all psychopaths, thought he was invincible and why shouldn’t he? Like Cosby and many other narcissists/psychopaths he had been getting away with abusing women for a long time and was getting cockier and more self-assured in his belief he was above the law. Just like your garden variety N, (like Paula pointed out in her article yesterday, a narcissist with money might be able to cover his track a bit longer) the famous narcissist starts to reveal more and more of himself the more he gets away with. They like the excitement, the pulling something off, being able to get away with something, feeling superior because they are too smart to get caught, they get great ego strokes from getting away with something right under someone’s nose. It must have been such a kick for James when he could get me to help in disabling my own truck or when he would leave evidence out so I would “catch” him cheating to throw me off the track of who he was really screwing or what was really going on. It is all a sick game and we all revolved around them, they pull the strings, they say jump and we all yell “How high?”
The tide is changing though, the more these parasites are exposed the less power they have, not just the Cosby’s and Ghomeshi’s but every narcissist/psychopath that exists or will exist; the last thing they want is to be exposed for the evil soul sucking bottom feeder they are; so if we can’t eradicate them from the earth at least we can force them to behave out of fear of being found out and held accountable. They will still be evil and will still try to get away with their shit but maybe people will start to believe the victim over the abuser and justice will be served and blame placed where it should be and not on the victim. MAYBE if enough of them are exposed we won’t have as many victims.
“At no point will I ever give my friend Jian’s version of the truth more credence than the version of the truth offered up by three women. Anonymity does not mean these women do not exist.”
—Toronto musician Owen Pallett in a Facebook post about Jian Ghomeshi, who was recently ousted from his job as host of Q on CBC Radio amid allegations of sexual abuse by several unnamed women. Ghomeshi disputes the accusations, which were detailed publicly for the first time in a Star investigation on Sunday, and has filed a $55-million lawsuit against his former employer. Note; Ghomeshi has dropped his lawsuit against CBC.