The Unintended Compliment

So very true!!! I know that I gave my ex respectability and credibility something he had lost with his family and I restored that for him. For 10 years I was his “smoke screen”, people didn’t think someone who was as honest and respectable as I am would be with a lying thief. I didn’t think I would be with a lying thief!
But after a while I had to face the truth. Like I said to James, a person can only be falsely accused so many times and then there is some truth to it.
He has to have the best, he doesn’t want a woman any man can get; he has to have the woman all the men want and why he gets so paranoid about losing you. After all he knows he treats you like crap and all the men want you; so he must control you and must always have another woman or two in the wings in case you do find another man.

Grace for my Heart

It’s Narcissist Friday!  

A backhanded (or left-handed) compliment is one that comes with its own slap. “That dress is amazing; it makes you look slim!”

A backwards compliment is much the same without the intent. “Your hair makes you look different, really cute!”

An unintended compliment is one that wasn’t meant to be a compliment at all. It may not have been meant as an insult either. It was probably just a statement or an action.

Narcissists do so much to pull people down. They criticize and insult and ignore and use. They say such cruel things and treat others like dirt. It doesn’t take long for some people to begin to believe the narcissist and think of themselves as inferior and unworthy.

But it might surprise you to realize that the narcissist gives you an unintended compliment every day. Whether he/she will admit it or not, you are…

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2 thoughts on “The Unintended Compliment

  1. healing

    Great read Carrie! Thank you for the reminder. I’ve stumbled quite a bit with feelings of guilt about the wrongs I committed in the relationship (cognitive dissonance). But this is what makes us so completely different than a narc. I also tried to figure out what “attracted” her for awhile as well. I finally figured out it was my compassion, strength, and light. She took advantage, and stole all three, leaving me empty and in complete darkness! I am slowly restoring and recovering my strength and light. I am very grateful for the knowledge of my strengths and weaknesses, for simple appreciation, and opportunity for growth. Thanks for sharing again Carrie.
    Love on..



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