You Know When You Have Been Smoozed

Anyone who has worked in business to any degree knows how to smooze and knows when they have been smoozed. It is part of doing business, tell a person what they want to hear, make them feel they have been heard and in actual fact nothing has been done or changed. When I worked in the payables dept at a major company I got really good at “smoozing” customers who would call in irate about not being paid yet. My co-workers would laugh and say I was going to to go to hell for the bullshit I spewed to make the customer happy. It was part of the job and I understand what and why the CEO did what he did. I could have predicted what was going to happen when I went to see the CEO but I wanted to go in with an open mind and see what he had to say. My definition of “smoozing”; (which by the way I really don’t think is a real word and something I just made up) is telling a person what they want to hear in order to appease them and save face. Whenever you have to deal with people in the business world you end up smoozing, or you wouldn’t last too long, but it is basically harmless, no one’s future is hanging in the balance. I do think there comes a point where no matter what the consequences are to a person, they have to be honest, admit their mistake and correct their error and I don’t think that has been done in my case. I understand that they are reliant on government funding to stay in business, they don’t want bad publicity for sure so the sooner they can appease me and shut me up the better, blaming me is even better, but I refuse to own any blame in this.

He is a kindly older gentleman and everyone in the office seemed surprised I had a meeting with him, the receptionist asked 3 times who I was there to see. He said he was terribly sorry that I had not come him right away (notice how it is MY fault because I didn’t come to him right away)  because I was “this close” (he showed with his thumb and fore finger space barely visible) to being approved. In fact he had been shocked to find out I had withdrawn my application. He said the only problem had been my budget didn’t balance with the facts (in other words he accused me of fudging my budget) because it didn’t contain the $9600 student loan. I explained that was because I didn’t get the approval until after I had handed in my application, I told the worker as soon as I knew and she changed my app. He kept putting it back on me saying I should have come to him. For one thing, it took me 3 days to find out who I needed to take my complaints to, his name is not on any paperwork I ever saw. There was no place that said, “If you have any problems call………” That is what my worker is for, I thought, but then he already said one was incompetent and the other one “misled me”.

The message he wants me to believe: He is totally innocent, he was going to approve me, if only I had come to him in the first place instead of going off half cocked, writing this letter to the better business bureau and causing all this trouble for him. Classic pass the buck bullshit in my estimation.

He denied ever saying he thought I should finance the whole thing through student loans, he never would have expected me to do that. He said that all it would have taken is another, maybe hour of work and I would have been approved. He would have burned the midnight oil to get my package done in time for me to start school. He had no idea why I had dropped out.

Of course it is all a mute point now because school has started and I am not in class. AND here is the kicker, I live in a different catchment now and out of his jurisdiction; but he encouraged me to reapply in my new area because I was so close to being approved.

As far as the employees, well that first worker was fired as soon as they realized how incompetent she was and the new worker was no better, as far as he is concerned, she basically lied to me. He and his underling,Ron,are totally innocent of any wrong doing, it was all the fault of their incompetent staff.

I am not letting it rest there though. I wanted to think on it and digest it for a day or two before I did anything. School has started and the next classes aren’t until July 6th so I have time to decide what I want to do. I am going to contact my worker and tell her what he said. I should have requested a meeting with her and him at the same time, maybe then I would have gotten the truth but as it stands he blew smoke up my ass and called it sunshine. It isn’t over until the plus sized lady sings and so far I only hear the birds.

As it turns out, there is no way I could have started school on time with the move and all. Stella was so freaked out about the boat at first she would have barked all day if I would have left her alone. By July she will be well adjusted and secure here, so maybe it is for the best. I am going to request the CEO provide his own recommendation stating that I was “this close” to be approved and he would like my app expedited, we will see how he responds. If he is being straight up he should not have a problem with that.

We will see what happens as the drama unfolds.

6 thoughts on “You Know When You Have Been Smoozed

  1. Jen


    I’m sorry you had to sit through the experience of yet another self-serving, unapologetic person twisting the truth to make everything your fault. It’s exhausting to never catch a break and have to fight for the things you want and need in life. I know how tiring it was to put your first application together and I understand there are many hoops you are asked to jump through to apply for funding. However, if this is a dream for you, I also know the work would be well worth it if you received the funding and could be a life coach as you have dreamed of being. I hope life on the boat re-energizes you and gives you the strength you need to follow your dream. Hugs!


    1. Carrie Reimer Post author

      Jen thank you, I keep feeling my purpose in life is going to somehow materialize soon. Something just HAS to fall into place. Sometimes if you have to fight for something too hard it isn’t meant to be. I am going to talk to the local office and see what they can do for me. Maybe I am focused in the wrong direction. I am at the point of reevaluating what I want to do and how to get there.
      Thanks for your support it means a lot to me!



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