We are all at different stages, some of us are still with the narcissist and waffling between leaving and staying; (probably today you are thinking about leaving because the N has done something to destroy another special occasion.) Some of us have just left and are imagining our ex having a wonderful Easter with his new “soul mate” and her children and wondering if maybe you did drive him to be abusive. (believe me history will repeat itself) Still others are lonely, bitter, full of regret for the years they “wasted” with the N and some are happy to be free of the drama and enjoying their peace and serenity.
My birthday is April 5th so this time of year is always a time of reflection and putting the past behind me and looking forward to a new fresh start, new beginnings. You too could make it a time of new beginnings and rebirth.
If you believe in the Bible and God, this is the time of rebirth, a time of celebration.
No matter what though it is a magical time of year, everything is coming back to life after the long winter, trees are budding, crocuses are breaking through the soil, daffodils and tulips are blooming,
Envision baby chicks, bunnies and little lambs cavorting in a field of tulips; you have to smile.
No matter what is going on in your life, take a few minutes to walk around your neighborhood, breath deep and enjoy the life all around you, stop and enjoy a garden of tulips or buy yourself a bouquet of spring flowers.
When you live with a narcissist you don’t realize how clouded your life becomes, it happens so subtly. You have had the black cloud of narcissism hanging over your life; you may not have recognized it at the time but if you have been away from the narcissist any amount of time you know what I am talking about.
Narcissists are so evil that the black cloud of narcissism hangs over everything they touch and do and everyone close to them, it becomes part of the victims existence and life. Victims get so accustomed to never feeling joy over anything, they stop expecting to feel joy, forget how to feel joy and happiness; always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
You have to actively seek out joy, you have to get out of your own head and your misery and open your eyes so you can see all the beauty around you. You have to remove the narcissist from your life in order to see the sunshine again. For even 5 minutes at a time stop thinking about the narcissist and all the pain and you lost and be thankful you will feel joy again, you can find happiness again. He will never know true happiness, he will always be evil and have to manipulate people to love him. There is no rebirth for the narcissist, no growth, no sunshine, no forgiveness, no joy.
Remember that the narcissist is not the helpless little sheep, he is the wolf in sheep’s clothing. He is not innocent, and not looking out for your best interest, he is looking out only for himself and he has no loyalty to you whatsoever!
Have a wonderful Easter and a spring of rebirth and new healthy growth!