Common Expressions of a Narcissist

Here are a few expressions commonly used by a narcissist. Please feel free to add any you might have in the comment section.

“I don’t know what to say about that”
When he knows he should be showing an emotion but because he doesn’t feel the same as everyone else.

“There are many types of love, the love I have for you is different”
When he is caught saying I love you to another woman.

“They can’t believe their good fortune to finally have someone there who knows what they are doing, it’s going to take me a while to straighten up the mess from the last guy”
(Every time he gets a new job)

“I had them eating out of my hands.”
(Believes in manipulating others to create results).

“You didn’t let me finish what I was saying.”
(After verbally maiming and then pretending there was more to say)

“Just because I didn’t do what you wanted when you wanted it.”
(A justification for receptively breaking promises)

“Just because I didn’t say what you wanted to hear.”
(A justification for verbal abuse)

“You’re the only person who misunderstands what I say”

“You’re to sensitive, over-emotional, paranoid.”
(Same as above)

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, you can’t repeat what I said 5 minutes ago”
(No matter what you say they said they will disagree)

“I’m sorry, what more do you want from me, I can never make you happy no matter what I do.”
(Followed by justifications for the behaviour with body language that is clearly not aligned with an apology)

“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry.”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)

“Why do you have to live in the past?”
(Followed by repetitive unacceptable behaviour)

“What about your issues?”
(When failing to take responsibility for unacceptable behaviour)

“You make me behave like this, I am only reacting to your actions”
(Same applies for above)

“You’re the only person in the world I have these problems with.”
(Same applies for above)

“I can’t live with your dysfunctional perceptions”

“Why would I want to; come home, answer the phone, do something nice for you, (fill in the blank) when you act like this?”(Diverting blame)

Uses “loop hole” statements, such as:
“I *think* I’m falling in love with you” (he didn’t say he does love you)
“I *could* do this or that” (later he can say I said I could not that I would)
“*If* I asked you to marry me would you?” ( he didn’t ask)
“What size is your ring finger?”
(How you interpret that is not his fault)

“You act like my mother,” or, “You’re a control freak.”
(When asked for the truth or trustworthy / accountable behaviour)

“You know I hate conflict, but you continue to create it”
(When you confront him on something he’s done)

“This is exactly why I look elsewhere, you are always angry”
(When confronted about cheating)

“You should listen to yourself”

“If you knew the truth you wouldn’t be upset” when asked what is the truth then? Replies,”You wouldn’t believe me if I told you anyway so why bother?”

“I’ve had enough, it’s over”
(When confronted on something like continued infidelity, rejecting you for being angry)

“I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person”
(While walking away from an argument)


812 thoughts on “Common Expressions of a Narcissist

  1. EJB

    My narcissist husband and I are separating. He just moved out and as he was leaving told me…I will no longer be your whipping boy, you won’t break me. Confused???? I have no idea what he is talking about.


  2. Michelle

    Oh my. I think my husband has said just about every one of these. Most common at my house…when I don’t hear him its my fault for not listening, but when he doesn’t hear me it’s also my fault for not speaking loud enough.

    We’ve been married 23 years and have 4 kids. Now my husband has MS and is getti,g even worse. I’ve made a mistake staying but he is so good at fooling people that I’ve been afraid to divorce him because he will make me look like the crazy one and take the kids. That would have been even worse for the kids.


    1. Hanging in there

      I’m on a custody battle with my ex-narcissistic right now. Rather than when with me, he asked for full custody. Is just to hurt me, he’s literally never wanted more than 2 days in a row with the kids, and often gets a babysitter for those days.

      But the “it’s always your fault” game is alive and well. now, I asked him to let me know when he would be out of town on his visitation days. He said no, he didn’t have to tell me anything, it’s “none of my business who the kids are with our where he is.” Howevergets gets upset when i inform him of travel plans (not on his days, I’m not restricted from traveling with kids).

      MS can definitely bring out the worst in people. Sorry
      You are dealing with that.



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